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Fifty Shades....

The missus bought a Paperback
Down Dymocks, Saturday,
I had a look in her bag;
T’was “fifty shades of grey”.

Well I just left her to it,
At ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread…..

In her left hand she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down on the floor,
And then began to strip.

Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Doris hasn’t weathered well;
She’s eighty four next week.

Watching Doris bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
Things went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!

She struggled up upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and…
Said…. I must dominate her!!

Now if you knew our Doris,
You’d see just why I spluttered,
I’d spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I’d muttered.

She stood there nude, naked like;
Bent forward just a bit ….
I thought what the hell,
Stepped forward,
And stood on her left tit!

Doris screamed, her teeth shot out;
My god what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
“Step on the other one”!!

Well readers, I can’t tell no more;
About what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,….
Turned “fifty shades of Grey”.

Josy!! :laugh3:

hysterical...

:idc:

This is better than the other fifty shades thread.

Stop bumping pointless threads :idc:

Did you write that? :shocked:
Edit: forget it

Christ sake you horrible troll.

Mods why isn't she banned omg :rolleyes:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Salman! (Post 5573123)

Did you write that? :shocked:
Edit: forget it

:joker::joker::joker:

Going to have to merge this with the other one

Well **** the lot of yous then, i'm deleting my 3 sigs and my avatar and I won't be ****ing back.

For at least 5 minutes.

Sympathy seeking troll too it seems. Worst kind :bored: