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-   -   Homophobia In The Streets (https://www.thisisbigbrother.com/forums/showthread.php?t=286197)

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:09 PM

Homophobia In The Streets
 
Coming from Cornwall I surprisingly didn't experience much abuse in the streets, maybe the odd thing from young teenagers or drunken men, but I always felt safe and comfortable there. When I moved to Manchester I always thought it would be great, there's a better gay-scene (or more gay people) so I thought it would be more widely accepted here. However, for the last 4/5 months I've been here nearly everytime I go out into the city centre I get homophobic abuse either shouted at me, whispered about me or weird shifty stares at me. Examples of abuse I.e "fag" "puff" etc the generic stuff. The other week a Turkish man spat at my feet and said nasty things, and by the way it's always men. I don't know if they're trying to be funny with their friends or something stupid like that, but it's always men.

I don't know if it's because I wear makeup or that I'm with my boyfriend or that I have a sense of fashion that seems to "invite" this sort of abuse, but it's starting to get to me. I usually ignore it, say that it doesn't get to me but it does. I'm paranoid everytime I go out that people are looking at me, that's if I go out at all because my anxiety has gotten to the point where I don't go out much anymore.

I'm moving to Liverpool for University in September and I'm worried because if someone says something to me my boyfriends not going to be there, and I'll run my mouth if someone says something and that leads to fighting... If I don't say anything then an inside rage builds up inside me. It also saddens me that in this day and age I'm still receiving abuse in the streets, people say we're lucky because it's not like Russia here where it's really bad, and yes it might not be as bad but trust me it's bad enough. I was just wondering if anyone else may have experienced this in the UK too and what to vent about it lol. Sorry this has been a long post.

Daniel. 09-08-2015 06:12 PM

Probably because you wear make up otherwise they don't tell

I loved Manchester

T* 09-08-2015 06:12 PM

:hug:

Will. 09-08-2015 06:16 PM

Come to London, theres isn't any homophobic abuse... that Ive seen.

this is shocking though... wtf.

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Daniel_ (Post 8054397)
Probably because you wear make up otherwise they don't tell

I loved Manchester

Yes but I don't see why I should change just because of ignorance. Wearing makeup doesn't even make you gay. The fact that a masculine gay man shouldn't receive abuse but a feminine gay man should because his homosexuality is more "showcased" is stupid. I hate society.

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Will1999 (Post 8054418)
Come to London, theres isn't any homophobic abuse... that Ive seen.

this is shocking though... wtf.

I've never experienced it in London, nor did I in Liverpool but I was only there three days.

Will. 09-08-2015 06:26 PM

surprised in Manchester

Locke. 09-08-2015 06:28 PM

No surprises here, very scummy place is Manchester. You should be alright in the city centre in Liverpool, some of the smaller towns in the city can be pretty rough but town is generally fine, and if you're going to John Moores I assume that you'll be living either in or around town.

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Will1999 (Post 8054442)
surprised in Manchester

It's ALWAYS on Market Street or around selfridges.

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Locke. (Post 8054444)
No surprises here, very scummy place is Manchester. You should be alright in the city centre in Liverpool, some of the smaller towns in the city can be pretty rough but town is generally fine, and if you're going to John Moores I assume that you'll be living either in or around town.

Yes John Moores and I am living in town I don't think I'd dare go out of the centre tbh

Jarrod 09-08-2015 06:31 PM

Britain needs to get over it and move with the times. Experiencing homophobia in this day and age is ridiculous! I hope you're okay. I have the same worries really about moving for university, but I've never really experienced it when I've visited the town.

The best thing to do is ignore it and if it gets too much report it to the police. They can help! That's what they're there for. I know it's stupid to say "ignore it" because I'd probably fight back, but that doesn't help really. Just do the right thing and report it. Most of the people doing it are very small minded and in some cases are actually fighting their own sexuality inside by offending others.

Jake. 09-08-2015 06:31 PM

Well what with it being Manchester it's hardly a shock, hopefully things change when you move

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jarrod (Post 8054451)
Britain needs to get over it and move with the times. Experiencing homophobia in this day and age is ridiculous! I hope you're okay. I have the same worries really about moving for university, but I've never really experienced it when I've visited the town.

The best thing to do is ignore it and if it gets too much report it to the police. They can help! That's what they're there for. I know it's stupid to say "ignore it" because I'd probably fight back, but that doesn't help really. Just do the right thing and report it. Most of the people doing it are very small minded and in some cases are actually fighting their own sexuality inside by offending others.

To be honest I never really notice it when people say things after they walk past me (apart from the man that spat) but it's my boyfriend who hears it and gets angry but my hearing isn't great so usually I'd be none the wiser, I don't know if that's a good thing or not. I feel like a ****ing spectacle in town and not in a good way.

Jarrod 09-08-2015 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Riley95 (Post 8054457)
To be honest I never really notice it when people say things after they walk past me (apart from the man that spat) but it's my boyfriend who hears it and gets angry but my hearing isn't great so usually I'd be none the wiser, I don't know if that's a good thing or not. I feel like a ****ing spectacle in town and not in a good way.

Eh, mine does the same sometimes but I've told him to ignore it. I hope you feel comfortable in university because it wouldn't be good for you or your study if you don't.

Wizard. 09-08-2015 06:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jarrod (Post 8054461)
Eh, mine does the same sometimes but I've told him to ignore it. I hope you feel comfortable in university because it wouldn't be good for you or your study if you don't.

Mhm I felt good about it when I visited and I'm really looking forward to it so I'm going to try and not let anyone ruin my fun.

armand.kay 09-08-2015 06:56 PM

I've never experienced anything like it myself and I've walked around with my mate and his boyfriend holding hands and no one would say anything. It's actually quite surprising coz I live in an urban area.

T* 09-08-2015 07:00 PM

I honestly think it'll be much better in Liverpool tbh

Ashley. 09-08-2015 07:11 PM

Never EVER move somewhere that has a big gay scene. That's the problem. Homosexuality is more apparent because of this, therefore people are more likely to shout stuff because they are more aware of you. If you don't want this to happen, then you should move to a place where being gay isn't such a big thing.

What you need to understand though is people are always going to be thinking stuff when you walk past them, regardless of whether they decided to tell you upfront like the people you're talking about or keep it to themselves. That's just a harsh fact of life; people will always judge you.

Mystic Mock 10-08-2015 04:00 AM

Just ignore them, don't be surprised if they're not gay themselves and they're uncomfortable with it.

kirklancaster 10-08-2015 07:33 AM

For Riley From Kirk:

YOU

You are YOU,
Comfortable in your own skin.
You are TRUE, HONEST
And keep NOTHING in.

You are YOU,
BEAUTIFUL and HOT
A MIRROR which they look in
And SEE ALL THE THINGS THEY'RE NOT.

So for those pygmy-minded cretins
Who stare or sneer
**** them Riley
THEY'RE the ones who are QUEER.

But perhaps my favourite anthem from the 80's says it better than I can:

I AM WHAT I AM

I am what I am
I am my own special creation
So come take a look
Give me the hook or the ovation

It's my world
That I want to have a little pride in
My world
And it's not a place I have to hide in

Life's not worth a dam till I can say
I am what I am

I am what I am
I don't want praise I don't want pity
I bang my own drum
Some think it's noise I think it's pretty

And so what if I love each sparkle and each bangle
Why not see things from a different angle
Your life is a shame
Till you can shout out I am what I am

I am what I am
And what I am needs no excuses
I deal my own deck
Sometimes the aces sometimes the deuces

It's one life and there's no return and no deposit
One life so it's time to open up your closet
Life's not worth a damn till you can shout out
I am what I am

I am what I am

I am what I am
And what I am needs no excuses
I deal my own deck sometimes
The aces sometimes the deuces

It's one life and there's no return and no deposit
One life so it's time to open up your closet
Life's not worth a dam till you can shout out
I am what I am

I am, I am, I am good
I am, I am, I am strong
I am, I am, I am worthy
I am, I am, I belong

I am, I am
Whoo, whoo, whoo
I am

I am, I am, I am useful
I am, I am, I am true
I am, I am, somebody
I am as good as you

Yes, I am

Songwriter
OWEN,MARK

Hold you head high, keep your back straight, and keep being you.

AnnieK 10-08-2015 07:41 AM

Not happy with the Manchester shaming in this thread :mad: obviously being a white heterosexual woman I haven't experienced anything first hand but I have a lot of gay friends who have moved to Manchester from smaller towns because of the abuse they have experienced from their communities. I'm sorry you've experienced this but don't tar all us Mancs with the same brush as the small minded horrid people you have encountered. I would bet good money they were not born in Manchester.....we are a nice people! Good luck in Liverpool for Uni....hope you are happier there.

kirklancaster 10-08-2015 07:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnieK (Post 8055492)
Not happy with the Manchester shaming in this thread :mad: obviously being a white heterosexual woman I haven't experienced anything first hand but I have a lot of gay friends who have moved to Manchester from smaller towns because of the abuse they have experienced from their communities. I'm sorry you've experienced this but don't tar all us Mancs with the same brush as the small minded horrid people you have encountered. I would bet good money they were not born in Manchester.....we are a nice people! Good luck in Liverpool for Uni....hope you are happier there.

That is so true Annie. We all used to go to Canal Street (The Village) to have a great time without dickheads wanting to cause trouble. It is a moronic minority who are to blame, and these can be found in every town and city.

As for the emboldened bit - The Turk CERTAINLY wasn't born there was he the cheeky bastard.

the truth 10-08-2015 08:17 AM

it sounds like a minority of bigotry but who knows. I tend to wear an ipod when im wombling around my town so don't hear the people im passing....dare I suggest it too, the mass immigration into the UK includes several million people not accustomed to our more liberal society, no doubt in some parts of the world spitting at gay people is sadly the norm,,,if its any consolation some ignorant people always exist and discriminate against anyone "different" whether its sexuality, disability, ethnicity, etc etc theyre idiots and we all have to put up with them unfortunately. you do have the option of going to the cops if it gets too much though

Black Dagger 10-08-2015 08:21 AM

kmt at the digs at Manchester in this thread. Luckily Annie protected our fine City <3.

Crimson Dynamo 10-08-2015 09:45 AM

"I don't know if it's because I wear makeup or that I'm with my boyfriend or that I have a sense of fashion that seems to "invite" this sort of abuse"

if you wear make up and dress funny then that will invite abuse

you need to be a bit more street smart


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