Quote:
Originally Posted by Mokka
(Post 9044444)
:flutter: You check all the boxes Kirk :hehe:
Mrs. Kirklancaster is a lucky lady
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Aww Thank you Mokka, you are so genuinely sweet and kind.
You do know though, that I jest above - I am really a sad old wrinkly geriatric who is balding, fat, and walks with a stutter and talks with a limp.
Oh - and I only have one tooth - growing out of my forehead.
My stomach is so enormous I had to stop playing golf, because if I put the ball where I could reach it I couldn't see it, and if I put it where I could see it, I couldn't reach it.
I have the same trouble fumbling beneath my gut trying to find my weenie little widgie at pee pee time. It got so bad, that I have had Braille Dots tattooed on it.
And I'm not fit at all now.
I've had to pack in Shadow Boxing, because the Shadow keeps beating me.
I am an abject failure at attracting women, and always was.
I was so lonely before I kidnapped my wife from the Blind School, that I tried to chat up a 42 stone 70 year old Mexican lady at a 'Lonely Hearts Supper For The Desperate' and girl, was she ugly.
I smoothed up to her as suave as I could manage in my corduroy three piece suit, and said; "Hi, I'm Don Juan, and I'd like to date you". She took one look at me and replied: "And I'm Conchita, and I Don Juan't to" then fled.
Apart from all that, I'm still the dashing young stud muffin I never was. :laugh: