ThisisBigBrother.com - UK TV Forums - Big Brother’s Chanelle McCleary speaks out about body dysmorphia hell

Quote:

Big Brother’s Chanelle McCleary speaks out about body dysmorphia hell – saying she considered suicide

BIG Brother’s Chanelle McCleary has spoken out about her hell dealing with body dysmorphia – saying she contemplated suicide.

In an emotional interview, the reality star told the Sun’s Bizarre column she would stick fingers down her throat and tried diet pills in desperate attempts to be thin.

Brave Chanelle, 25, was diagnosed with the disorder – which causes the person to have a skewed view of how they look and therefore worry about their image - when she was 17.

At her thinnest was a mere seven-and-a-half stone and a size four – she is now a size ten.

She says her television work, beginning with Take Me Out at 20, helped her overcome cruel bullies who taunted her over her appearance.

She said: “I was never happy looking at myself – never confident.

“There was always something wrong. You’re constantly putting yourself down and not thinking you’re good enough.

“When people have approached me for television work I would feel like ‘oh why do they want me?’

“I was getting nice feedback like ‘you’re funny and down to earth’. It really helped build my confidence.

“And people used to stop commenting on my appearance and started to talk about my personality. And that really helped my confidence.”

The former Ex On The Beach star says callous bullies at school and college would ridicule her for her teeth and boobs.

And at one point her confidence was so low, she wouldn’t have sex with her boyfriend with the lights on.

Chanelle revealed she turned to plastic surgery as early as 19, when she had her boobs done, to make herself feel better.

She has since had work done on her cheeks, lips, teeth and bum as well as botox.

Chanelle said: “None of the boys fancied me – they all called me ugly.

“I had no boobs, so I would be called ‘no boobs’.

“I got diet pills – I tried anything to get any skinnier. I got a lot of torment for my teeth – I had fanged teeth. So I got them done even though I was told not to.

“I did try to put my fingers down my throat – just anything I could do to get skinnier.

“I’ve gone through days when I thought ‘should I be here?’ But I’ve got my nanny and granddad and they’re like my guardian angels so I could never do that to them. So I had to soldier through it for them.

“I was like a size four or six, I had twiggy legs and twiggy arms and that’s what I thought looked good. So my mind-set was ‘the skinnier the better’.

“I wouldn’t leave the house. I would lock myself away.

"I wanted any plastic surgery I could get but I couldn’t afford it, so I saved up for my boobs and I was really happy about them and gave me confidence.

“Before I had my breast op, I wouldn’t have sex with my boyfriend with the lights on. I just did not like my body one bit. I wouldn’t let them know what I was feeling. I didn’t feel sexy.”

Now Chanelle says she is a totally different woman, with a supportive boyfriend.

After appearances on Dinner Date, Dating in the Dark, Ex On The Beach and latterly Big Brother, she insists comments about her appearance do not bother her anymore and she has grown in confidence.

She said: “When I got out of Big Brother, I got so many messages from young girls saying how they used to be bullied and watching me has made them want to be themselves – I’ve been overwhelmed by it.

"Some have said I’ve inspired them and ‘I’m like what the hell?’

“The pressure when you’re younger - looking at other girls and seeing celebrities on social media - you do feel like you have to look a certain way.

“I never used to be loud, I wasn’t like I am now, I wasn’t outspoken. Now I won’t stand by and watch people being bullied. It’s made me a better person.

“It’s only been about a year or so ago that I’ve learned not to compare myself to others – accept who you are. I have such amazing friends and family.

“I think a lot of men don’t get the pressures on women.”

“Everyone looks at the Kardashians and everyone thinks they should look that way. They don’t even look that way – everyone uses Photoshop.”

https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbi...ting-disorder/