Heads Up - Its Operation \"Housemate Guardian\"
 

Good Evening

Sorry about the late hour of this briefing

At request of Central Command I have Just shipped over from the K-O-D thread to here. I am informed that for this post I will be Acting Group Captain Sticks (A temporary promotion up one grade from Wing commander)

BB4 is soon bearing down upon us, and an assorted bunch of previously ordinary folk who have volenteered to take paert will be thrust upon the consciousness of the nation.

Central command are aware that certain things are yet to occur, such as:

• A medical evac of a housemate
• Intimate relations between two or more housemates :blush:
• Intruders intent on harming the housemates
• A terrorist attack
• An emergency requiring an evacuation
• A suicide attempt by a housemate (During or after the show)
• Channel 4 / Endemol playing fair (Yes it is a low probability but central command asked we include everything)

Some things we can not prevent from happening, but somethings may be in our power to influence.
[list][*]We should expect that one or more housemates will be louder thanusual, due to excitement (Cf Helen & Jade) They are not to be thrown to the wolves immediately. Allowances must be made this time for exuberance :nono:
[*]This is a game show, some will be playing to win, providing rules are not breached and common decency are observed this is legitimate. Lynch mobs are unacceptable
[*]Some may need to be evicted for their own good.
[*]C4 may want to spin the highlights in favour of a chosen winner

In short the mission is to look after the interests of the housemates during the campaign and to hold C4 / Endemol to account to makesure they play fair.

A list of E-mail addresses will be published shortly.

This could be a tough and dirty campaign, but We are certain you are up to this challenge.

Dismissed

Acting Group Captain Sticks

I am confident that in times of adversity you will continue to keep a stiff upper lip.

Good luck :thumbs:

Sticks, I find it deeply reassuring that in an age when moral turpitude ( behaviour which is inherently base, vile or depraved)
is increasingly the norm, we still have men of your calibre protecting the populace from the slimy underbelly of life.

We can all sleep safe in our beds in the knowledge that somewhere out there is a guardian of human morality, ever watchful and never ceasing in their attempts to keep us innocent, chaste and unsullied.

I feel a rousing chorus of 'Oh Sir Jasper do not touch me' is in order.........:spin2:

Batten down the hatches! Here comes BB4 !!!

24 Hours to go
 

Afternoon Squad

We need to keep this briefing short.

In just over 24 hours from now 12 fresh faced people excited to make it from amongst thousands of other will be launched into the goldfish bowl of the BB House and the un-remiting glare of the press.

Some may be loud and grate on our sensibilities.

You must not allow this to cloud your impartiality :nono:

Miss Goody got a raw deal last year because people reacted against her exuberance. It must not happen again

Helen was like that when she first entered so exercise some restraint and tolerance.

There will be, I hear from Central Command a background check on the contestants of some sort. I will pass the results as soon as they arrive at the appropriate briefing.

Those with Access to E4 are requested to do comparrisons with E4 coverage and C4 Coverage.

Any deviation from a fair gameshow by those in control must be flagged.

We are still waiting the Contact Details for Big Brother.

That is all I have this afternoon. I am out at a function tonight, so I have to record stuff off of sky and get a relative to tape the C5 programme tonight.

Remember Stay Alert - This is not a drill.

Opperations begin at 20:30 hrs Tomorrow night.

Helen was lovely then and still is but shame about her loser boyfriend Paul Clarke. He was such a non-entity and would have gone earlier if it had not been for Helen!

This is not the place for talking about the past. Please do not get side tracked :nono:

As for your comments about Mr Clarke I will leave it to Sergeant ROB to meter out any action deemed appropriate.

Now Heads up People Central Command have received an intelligence report that could be nothing or could be an indicator that this campaign will not be such a walk in the park.

At 04:50 it was reported that three goldfish in the BB house had expired and had to be replaced. Central Command has not established if this is an omen, a portent, sign of missmangement or something else.

We need everyone combat ready. A reccomendation is being made to central command to close down K-O-D so resources can be channeled to Operation "Housemate Guardian"


http://www.operations.mod.uk/telic/i...ndstorm_tn.jpg

Erm, I will restrain myself sufficiently to say that I do not share your views on Paul Clarke.

I am as you can see, not only a fan, but his honorary number one fan! There are also a lot of others on here that recognised him to be much maligned, fundamentally decent, and furthermore, stonkingly gorgeous.

Each to their own, but please go easy on Mr Clarke, there's a good Hunnybabe.

He is fan-bloody-tastic!!

How could you hunnybabe. You criticise the magnificent Mr C at your peril. :nono::nono:

But we forgive you a little cos you like our Helen:thumbs::thumbs:

Sticks they have signed their lives away mate,they knew the score and how Endemol will royally screw them and still they accepted. :conf:

now all us horrible people can scrutinise and criticize their every move.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

At the start, I didn't care for Paul either. I thought he was "a lad" and a boastful one at that, just as Helen did.

As I got to k_now him, as the weeks went on, I realised he was a smashing bloke, decent, honest and a complete gentleman. Like Helen, I was totally won over and remain an e_normous fan of his.

I'm sorry you thought he was a loser, hunnybabe. I think he is a winner.

:wavey:

Sometimes a person can be so desparate that they will sign up to anything. By analagy those hooked on narcotics are likely to do whatever it takes to get their next hit.

Judgement can be clouded

It is our duty to stay focused on the job in hand.

Endemol / C4 must _not think they can get away with anything they like.

We must make sure this is a proper fair competition.

We must protect the contestants from themselves. This must mean that we may have to evict a popular housemate if it is in their best interest.

Conversely we may have to keep in a housemate that may irritate a lot of people.

before you stand in judgement on them, consider how you would fair.
:_no_no: