PIERS MORGAN presents a hilarious sneak preview of Meghan and Harry's Netflix deal
 

Enjoyed this :joker:

'Around the world in 80 private jets' and other adventures: PIERS MORGAN presents a hilarious sneak preview of the woke TV the world can expect from Meghan and Harry's $150million Netflix deal
………...what they have inspired is me to now cast a crystal ball and look into the future to imagine the kind of hyper-woke, self-serving productions that I look forward to seeing on Netflix from Megxit Productions:

1) HOW TO HAVE YOUR ROYAL CAKE AND EAT IT - An inspiring and educational film in which the Sussexes throw vegan tea (Echinacea, obviously!) parties at their palatial Santa Barbara mansion for random strangers and explain how to milk (Almond…obviously!) the Royal Family brand name for massive financial gain.

2) AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 PRIVATE JETS - A lavish travel docu-series in which we follow the Duke and Duchess around as they bang on endlessly about the environment, saving the planet and the urgent need to reduce one's carbon footprint during live broadcasts filmed aboard their famous friends' private jets. Cameos from George Clooney, Sir Elton John and bankers from JP Morgan.

3) THE BROTHER GRIMM - An animated children's film depicting a fierce sibling rivalry between a saintly, much-misunderstood sensitive caring hero named Harry who never does anything wrong and his evil older brother William who has the audacity to think being the heir to the throne gives him some kind of entitlement to be treated differently, and even worse, had the bloody gall to suggest Harry think hard about marrying an ultra-woke, fame-hungry, much older American C-list actress divorcee social climber with a history of dumping people.

4) MEAT THE PARENT FOCKERS - A horror movie reboot of the popular comedy movie franchise starring the heroine's father Thomas – played by Robert de Niro – who gets disowned for daring to do exactly what his daughter did and collude with paparazzi, and ends up suffering a grisly demise when furious Meghan throws him into a meat-packing mincer during an angry reunion. She immediately blames the incident on the 'racist media'.

5) THE FROWN – A regal drama sequel to The Crown in which a rogue asteroid hits Sandringham during Christmas lunch, wiping out the top tier of the Royal Family, and meaning Harry and Meghan – who snubbed the holiday to be on Oprah's yacht instead - finally become King and Queen. Unfortunately, having got what they so badly craved, they spend so much time whining about everything ('The gold-plated Buckingham Palace toilet seats don't have enough gold in them!) and greedily exploiting their new-found status (Meghan is caught selling 'boring' royal art on eBay) that the British public rises up in fury and demands Prince Andrew replaces them as Monarch to reintroduce some integrity to the throne.

6) KEEPING UP WITH THE SUSSEXES – A Kardashian-style 24/7 fly-on-the-wall reality show featuring Harry and Meghan as two very private people leading very private lives with lots of scenes involving their son Archie who they want to keep very private.

7) FROGMORE COTTAGE – An enthralling Downtown Abbey style period drama set inside the lavish walls of the Sussexes' home in England where a huge privileged family spend the entire time plotting against each other and settling endless petty scores.

8) IS MEGHAN OK? - A powerful mental health documentary filmed at the height of the pandemic when health workers earning a pittance were dying in their droves trying to save lives. It features Meghan, wearing a suit of armor once worn by Joan of Arc, sitting inside billionaire star Tyler Perry's Beverly Hills mansion, being served chilled champagne by a butler, as Harry washes her laundry, asking the one burning question everyone in the world was asking as Covid-19 ran riot – 'WHY DOES NOBODY ASK MEGHAN IF SHE'S OK?'

9) WOKE ME UP BEFORE YOU GO GO - A musical about a ginger-haired teetotal kale-munching pop star named Harry Prince that falls for a fame-hungry B-list actress who forces him to abandon his family and country, wokes him to within an inch of his life, and then dumps him for Leonardo DiCaprio when he offers her co-star role in Titanic 2.

10) I DON'T WANT TO BE A VACUOUS CELEBRITY ANY MORE, GET ME OUT OF HERE – Harry finally grows a pair big enough to escape his woke hell, comes home, plays naked billiards, re-joins the Army and marries one of the dim blonde Young Conservatives that his brother told him he should marry in the first place.

:joker:

Maybe we could a get a reboot of I Wanna Marry "Harry" with the real Harry.

Obviously they would have to get a divorce but money is money at the end of the day.

Hilarious

:joker:

re-joins the Army and marries one of the dim blonde Young Conservatives that his brother told him he should marry in the first place.... bet he'd rather cut his nads off with a rusty bread knife.

Sounds like one of their successful pitches to Netflix :hehe:

That and Monkey Tennis

i may watch what they produce out of morbid curiosity .... from that perspective netflix have played a blinder

:hehe:

He likes smart ladies though. South African Chelsey Davey (law degree, businesswoman) was Harry’s first love of 6 years. He wanted to marry her and live a quiet life in his beloved S.Africa, but she turned him down in the end. He always said she was the love of his life - before he met Megs of course. Couldn’t risk it afterwards, she might cut off his nads with a rusty bread knife….:hee:

That's the idea, same with the Obamas, though I have no idea what they were involved in, maybe its a work in progress :think:

:joker:

that is a very unflattering gif of Will and Kate :laugh:

Absolutely brilliant...:joker:

NETFLIX is to screen a tacky musical about Princess Diana — after signing up her son Harry and his wife Meghan in a £112million deal.

In the show the Queen calls the tragic princess a “tart”, while another scene sees Diana in bed with James Hewitt.
Her former bodyguard Ken Wharfe tonight urged Harry to get the musical pulled.

The musical also sees the Queen say to Diana: “In the old days we would have chopped off your head.”
The streaming giant is to air the sordid show despite signing Di’s son Harry and wife Meghan in the mega deal.

However, Harry was facing calls last night to stand up to his new TV paymasters and get Diana: A New Musical pulled.
The stage show details the breakdown of Charles and Diana’s marriage with swathes of vulgar dialogue and scenes of fiction…….

…...The show was previewed in New York in March — with theatregoers promised a tale about a “fearless princess who became timeless”.
However, a planned Broadway run was cancelled amid the coronavirus pandemic.
Netflix now plans to record it again this month at a New York theatre and broadcast it next year.

Ken Wharfe, 72, Diana’s former bodyguard, last night said Harry could now call on Netflix to ditch the “abhorrent” musical.
He said: “The Diana musical, soon to be premiered on Netflix, presents a huge dilemma to them both. If the critics are to be believed, this musical story is not a joyous journey of love with a happy ending but an episodic account of untruths, scandal and sex.

“Harry loved his mother dearly and has spoken of her in such loving detail recently.
“He now has the chance, irrespective of his lucrative deal with Netflix, to stand alone from his wife and make clear his abhorrence of such a musical and call Netflix to account.

“If he were to do this, his fading popularity would be guaranteed a huge resurgence.”
Representatives for Netflix and Meghan and Harry did not respond to requests for comment.
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Hmmm...I wonder what he'll do.

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/125770...James%20Hewitt.

I thought he was ignoring them now :shrug:

He’s got a book to sell!

😍

Look at that giff...kate is far more like diane than meghan..

Baldy husband and a brave face..

Not like harry/Andy meghan/fergie........and we all know how that's turning out..poor kids.

Yes, that's what everyone wants, a wife who looks like their mother. :/

She looks nothing like Diane....what you trying to say now?

Who is this Diane you keep talking about?

Of wales.

I camt help glasses and predictive text.

Ah, Diane of Wales.

But Kate's more like her than meghan ever will be..meghan and harry are the spam or fraybentos pie version of andrew and Sarah's half cooked steak at Miller and Carter..

Glad you agree.