What should I do
 

I have a friend who has been a great friend for nine years but her parents don't like her talking to me should I end the friendship

NOOO.... if you have a great friendship dont let anyone come between you. I feel for your friend though...everyone wants their parents to like their friends.

She was more than a friend we were together at one point

It depends on why they don’t like you. If you gave your friend heroine and now she’s not doing well, it’s understandable they don’t want her to talk to you.
But apart from that you should continue the friendship.

Does it bother her that her parents don't like you? and do you know why they don't?

if she wants to be friends, then I don't see the issue, obviously if it is upsetting her and causing friction at home its a bit more difficult as you will worry it is causing her stress

9 years is a long time, is this a recent thing with the parents

They think im talking to her to much

I've never met her parents yet

Try to meet them for a coffee or something to clear the air and get to know each other? Communication is key and can help remove those misunderstandings or preconceived ideas. Give it a try and if unsuccessful, run away with your friend and never look back :shrug:

are you sure it's not actually your friend that is looking to end the connection and is laying the groundwork through her folks?

Seems a weird thing to bring up 9 years into a friendship when you've never even met them.

Has she started a new relationship fairly recently?

is she doing exams or something, it's none of their business really :laugh:

She isn't that kinda person she says im her best friend





As for the new relationship question don't think so

Honestly I'd walk away but I'm terrible like that. I don't enjoy losing touch but if someone can't be arsed...bye.

I think it calls for a frank conversation. Want to save your friendship? Let her know. Nine years is too much to throw away on a whim.

But it's also a long time to go without meeting someone's family tbh. Do you feel you're best friends? On Steph's show last week there was a feature about "frexits", or ending friendships. Is it possible she saw or heard of that, and you're someone she wants to trim?

A best friend that's never met her parents?

Something seems off. I don't mean with you, either, I just mean there's information that she isn't telling you. How would even know how often/much you talk?

Of course, all this is just from a snippet, so I could well be wrong.

My daughter uses that one, "My parents said we're not allowed to be friends". :fist:

NO we pointed out that the kids treated her like **** half the time and that it wasn't OK that this kid didn't want her to have "other friends that she didn't know" (and they don't even go to the same school... so that included school friends :umm2: ) BUT we made it really clear that it was ultimately her choice.

But no she tells her she doesn't want to be her friend any more and then when the kid keeps demanding to know why, says "my parents say I'm not allowed" so now we get to be the horrible people who won't let their daughter be friends with a kid because her whole family is littered with drug addicts. HMPH.



...anyway OP how old is this friend? if she's 15+ it's a bit concerning if her parents tell her who she can and can't talk to :think:. Unless she's 16 or 17 and you're 40 or summat. In which case yes OK.

We're both 25



We lost touch for a while but got back in touch during lockdown

I thought you were probably both around 18ish, but if she's 25, then what?

I would suggest it's one of the following things

1 - She used you through lockdown to help pass the time, but now things are getting back to normal she doesn't want the responsibility.

2) She likes you, and by referring to how much time others are noticing you're spending talking, she puts that out there without fear, to test the waters.

3) She's seeing someone else, and (either she or he) doesn't want an ex hanging around

4) There's a massive misunderstanding between the both of you that needs a conversation.

Have you been flirty at all?

Oh no I hope shs wasn't using me




I still have strong feelings for her

If I could give you a bit of advice, it would be that you need to have a chat with her. We can all speculate on here and make you feel great/bad depending on our replies, but there is only one person who give you a definitive answer.

Talk to her. If it's eating you up, then you need to find out the truth, even if it breaks your heart.

Its not just that but we are friends with the same crowd

If she is 25 that really is too old for her parent's to be sticking their oar in. I agree with Slim....there's something else going on. You will only know if uou have the conversation, however hard that is.

How did you lose touch if you're in the same friend group? How would cutting her off, as you said in OP, help that?

There is also the fact her dad is unwell

We lost touch because we stopped going to college on the same days

I think its best to not talk to her