It's Christmas!
 

This will be our first Christmas dinner without grandad, but we know he'll be up there looking down on us as we tuck in.

It's his own fault for breaking the stairlift

I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me "Nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace" So I bought her nothing.

Don't forget to put your bathroom scales back half a stone this Saturday at 1am, for Christmas.

Why couldn't Mary take a conference call?

I was walking home with a Christmas tree the other day and this guy came upto me and said "Are you gonna be putting that up yourself?" I said no, I'm gonna be putting it up in the living room

No I heard him too much


Bog off slade

:laugh:

I am playing Santana in 5.1
to wash that Slade aways

:laugh2:

“I was watching the London Marathon and saw one runner dressed as a chicken and
another runner dressed as an egg. I thought: ‘This could be interesting.'”

“I went to a pub quiz in Liverpool, had a few drinks so wasn’t much use. Just for a laugh I
wrote The Beatles or Steven Gerrard for every answer … came second.”

“I remember doing security at the Brits a few years back when it all kicked off between Steps and Jamiroquai. I was the only thing between H and JK.”

Did you know that the actor Yul Brynner was a lifelong Liverpool fan, and he never wore aftershave in his entire life.

:joker:

I purchased a world map and then gave my wife a dart and said, “Throw this and wherever it lands—that’s where I’m taking you when this pandemic ends.” Turns out, we’re spending 2 weeks at the back of the fridge

:joker::joker:

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house!

how many Elves does Santa have with him to deliver presents at people's homes?

What food shopping do you have left to do?

I've already done plenty but I'll do a little bit more tomorrow, a little bit on Thursday then my fruit and veg and a few other little bits first thing on Christmas eve morning.

Do you do yours a bit at a time like me or all in one go?

I start in October, and add a few bits so I dont have to do a massive shop. I only have the veg to get, picking up bread from the bakery on Christmas eve and thats it, think I will go out early tomorrow and get the veg, I have parsnips in the fridge and as I am the only one that likes a parsnip I probably will make do with those even though they are a bit soft :laugh:

this is kinda what we call a christmas song too, here in my nation


given the show with same title we have here, quite the tradition of its christmas special

with ''doctor love'' presenter Robert ten Brink

basically going to different countries where dutch people live and reuniting them with loved ones who they haven't seen in a long while

also how they make this possible amid a covid pandemic i don't quite understand :laugh: