How shy/modest are you around people much older?
 

And by that I mean how you tend to engage in conventional formalities with people who are significantly older (i.e., by more than 15 years) around you (aunties in their 40s if you’re a 20-something; people close enough to the typical grandparent age if you’re in your 40s or so)? Do you just say what you need to say out of politeness and scurry back off out of timidity or would you actually choose to initiate a long conversation with them and feel relatively confident and free?

“First of all, it depends on my mood”

(Or whatever else it depends on.)

when i speak to people in their 40s i am fine

i don't have an opportunity to speak to people that are much older than me :laugh:

I can’t tell if you’re joking or not but I was using people in their 40s as an example for much younger people (teens and 20-somethings). In your case I imagine your elders would be people of grand-parenting age (no offence).

You need to pop over to Florida and report back on your shyness.

On-topic I used to have a characteristic awkward quirk around my parents’ guests of offering them a cuppa when they blatantly had brandy/wine/Guinness on their table and were good with that (as you would be) and that’s something that was obviously borne out of a certain coy shyness than actually genuinely not knowing what to say in those hospitable situations. But generally I’ve always felt more at ease interacting with people somewhat closer to my parents’ age (not that I was ever that awkward around my age mates at the best of times but with age inevitably comes a certain mellow contemplation and I don’t tend to get on that much with people who are just loud for the sake of being loud). That kind of breaks through the awkward-small-talk/pleasantries-only conduct a lot of people adopt when there’s more than 15 years’ age difference between them and the person they’re talking to but I just find older people to be weightier when it comes to potential conversational material (so long as they’re relatively emotionally well-rounded as well). That’s why I get on better with older people even ’though I’m at an age now when it should’ve well evened out by now. I still have a lot of buddies my age (including one of my best ones) but the conversations and concrete connections only tend to go so far and so deep.

The only time I feel fully at ease around people under a certain age is when I’m somewhat stoned and for practical reasons I only get high on occasion (contrary to what some people on here think I’m really not that much of a stoner, at all). Dutch Courage allows me to ease up a bit as well but I only drink on weekends so when I have to be around people younger than mid-30s on a day-to-day basis I just buckle it up and get by. It’s not awkward as such but unless I vibe with them that well from the off or we’re well-established friends I’d rather not.

"for practical reasons I only get high on occasion "


https://i.gifer.com/origin/03/03aa47...71201_w200.gif

Just like for practical reasons some people only drink every other weekend. I smoke a lot less.

Unless it’s practical to walk around drunk or stoned 24/7 when you have a busy life or tight budget (or whatever the case may be). One of those substances kills and the other doesn’t but ultimately none of that’s of direct concern to anyone other than the person. One man’s poison is another’s gold and vice-versa. Not my business so long as I’m not stabbed by someone mortal on whiskey on a Saturday night in town.

The people I speak to range from millionaires to tramps, babies to the very old
I don’t take myself too seriously or anyone else for that matter

Was it sort of instilled in you from a young age to have a certain level of conventional respect for elders or did you sort of just take people as they were even then?

I was told by my parents to respect my elders and then throughout my school years you are taught about respect and responsibility

Dealing with loads of medical professionals due to my daughter, dealing with older people through work.

Every person has their kryptonite.

How is your daughter, by the way? (If you don’t mind me asking.)

I don't treat older people any different than people of the same age as me, equal respect.

I'm more at ease with older people than I am with younger.

Younger people intimidate me a bit weirdly. :joker:

Mhm, I feel you on a spiritual level with that one. Younger people (under-34s/35s,, as a broad rule) make good enough buddies to me (not least because I’m in that age bracket myself regardless of anything else) and everyone has their own unparalleled level of maturity in at least something to specific to them but generally I just feel like the older they are the deeper the conversations go so that’s just kind of how it is. Most of the bad experiences I’ve had in my life have been with obnoxious young people than anyone else. With people over a certain age there’s almost always this mutual level of respect that comes almost automatically.

Unless the person in question happens to be a dickhead (which is just as often the case) but with me being the way I am (reserved) I’m selective when it comes to talking to even people I’ve known and loved for years and years so for me to observe someone for long enough and come to the conclusion that we can talk and converse in any mutually-meaningful capacity I would’ve sort of filtered out a lot of toxicity so I don’t tend to directly-associate with people who have traits that really don’t resonate with me. Unless I’m stuck in situations where it would be rude to do anything else but even then I keep our interactions as brief as possible and I’m still more wary when it comes to interacting with people under a certain age. There are 28-year-olds out there who have an aggressive sense of entitlement that’s way more poisonous and difficult to be around than a certain level of prejudice of sorts (for example) that’s more amendable to third-party input.

Of course I don’t mind you asking, she is my life.

She is doing good, when I say good it’s because I know things could be so much worse.
A rare metabolic condition from birth, not the worst .
Diagnosed with autistic at 16 but high functioning

Got mentally ill in 2019.
Started hearing voices, she always used to talk to herself,
Thankfully it wasn’t schizophrenia.
Medication, 1mg twice a day of risperidone, 5ml of aripiptazole, mirtazapine 15mg at night the down side of this anti depressant it causes weight gain, 25mg promethazine at night.

.

Yeah I don't really care. I treat everyone pretty much the same. The rank is but the farthing stamp.

I once went on an internet date with someone whose age wasn't listed and whose photos were filtered to buggery, and turned out to be much older than expected and portrayed. I trolled him in turn by worrying about the thickness of his sweater and if the alcohol would affect his blood pressure :joker:

How shy/modest are you around people much older?
 

I haven’t read through the this thread yet but I treat everyone the same although I guess it’s normal to be a little more respectful towards the elderly for many reasons


When we’re out shopping I chat with homeless guys (it normally is guys rather than women oddly ) and wherever possible give them a pie or sausage roll and a bottle of water .

My wife sometimes comments that I treat them as I would a good friend or doctor or a surgeon or policeman .. I was gonna say royalty but I wouldn’t bother with them ..

I’m not impressed with ‘status’ at all .. if the Queen or a celebrity visited our town or street even .. I wouldn’t even go to the front window to look .


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It's not odd, homeless women get snapped up by pimps and are forced into prostitution.

Alright super-nanny, chill your boots :laugh2: