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My Song. (Now With Me Singing.. Eeek)

Heyyyy xx

I wrote a song, and i just wanted to share it with you all and see what you thought.

So here it is:
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I Believe In Love(At First Sight)

Looking in your eyes,
your bright shining eyes,
having a tingling feeling for from your head,
to your toes,
Your constantly thinking, of that one,
24/7.
it feels like I’m falling into a big whole,
that is known as,
love.

I believe in love.
At first sight.
I believe in you and me
I believe in eternity.
I believe me and you
Can travel though and through
The rain.
I believe in love.

As i hug you, as i hold you,
never wanting to let you go,
I feel the thumping feeling,
in your heart,
In your head,
pounding through your body,
from you,
to me,
I feel like were connected.
Oh yeah this is love

I believe in love.
At first sight.
I believe in you and me
I believe in eternity.
I believe me and you
Can travel though and through
The rain.
I believe in love.

I feel like i belong, next to you,
I feel like its my home, where i am happy,
Shone from this
Star to guide me
Sung through my
Silent heart
Like a tender kiss
So deep inside me....
Ten thousand nights of darkness
In the ether underneath this garden
You are my heart's calling....
I don’t want this to end, because,
if it does, my heart, will become a million pieces,
Ohhhhhhhhhhh

I believe in love.
At first sight.
I believe in you and me
I believe in eternity.
I believe me and you
Can travel though and through
The rain.
I believe in love.

Ohh yeah.

I Believe in love.[/b]

As Requested..
http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/b...FirstSight.jpg
Click the big picture thing to listen lol x(Im Ill. Cut Me Some Slack PLEASE LOL)
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Sooo Wotcha think? lol

Love
Conzors
xxx

That's really good! Although it's hard to read lyrics without a tune in your head,lol. Have you written music to it too?

Yeah, nice lyrics, but it needs a tune to be called a song :P

Quote:

it feels like I’m falling into a big whole

Hole**

It's good Conor but im with Princess, do you have a tune to go with it?

I liked it , i just think you need to give us a tune then it will be perfect. :love:

Yeahh I have tune to it. :P.

But im scared to post my singing on here. LOL. I have writted music to it aswell.. just need to record it into this song thing at school LOL.

Ty though.

xxx

Okay Okay.

Ill sing it then irl post it. LOL.

Wow, that's really good. You'll have to record it!

My ears are bleeding.

Quote:

Originally posted by Gazbo
My ears are bleeding.

:joker:

Quote:

Originally posted by Gazbo
My ears are bleeding.

Dont Be Harsh

I LOVED it apart from when I thought you we're going to break out into a rendition of I Believe I Can Fly :laugh:

do you want me to be honest?

I don't think the lyrics work well and where they are placed, like theres more syllables in places where there shouldn't be and the tempo changes. But overall for it being your song its alright actually. Just needs to be worked on alot. Take that constructivly.

i think your voice would be actually quite good with some lessons,it really diddn`t sound bad at all.The songs good,better than I could do lol but some of the words just didn`t seem to fit and i kept thinking you were going to burst into i beleive i can fly ,but really good effort,you should keep working on it =]

Quote:

Originally posted by Gazbo
My ears are bleeding.

lol =]

Quote:

Originally posted by Conzors

Quote:

Originally posted by Gazbo
My ears are bleeding.

lol =]

I don't think he meant it jokingly.

LOL Im pure embarassed now PMSL.

i see a potential!

Lol!!!!!!!

it sounded as though you were having some sort of breathing attack :\
but it was good-ish

Quote:

Originally posted by Scampi

Quote:

Originally posted by Conzors

Quote:

Originally posted by Gazbo
My ears are bleeding.

lol =]

I don't think he meant it jokingly.

I know.

I laughing because i know its poo. i just wanted you lot to get the thing of what the lyrics sound like. lol.

I think though you need to work on word placement, cause the pattern of syllabes doesn't work. Try re-doing the first verse and chorus and working on the pattern and maybe keep the same pattern for each verse?