My Song Writing! New Song Up - Hey Daddy [BestSongToDate].
 

Here I am gonna starting posting some of my song writing work.

Coming Soon:-
1. Four Mornings
2. I Like It
3. The Baguette Girl
4. Hey Daddy
5. Playing With Fire

And More...

Please post comments on what's good, and what's not. I would really like to know.

Reminder:-
All of my songsare either based on true experiences, or is about someone I actually know.

Oooo, I write music too! :thumbs:

I'll keep my eye on this thread. :spin2:

Feel free to post here. I am currently writing album three if that makes sense. I write them into an album collection.

Album 1:-
16 Songs
Album 2:-
42 Songs
Album 3:- [In Progress]
12 Minimum Songs.

The Baguette Girl [Written On 1st February 2009]

You can keep going around saying whatever
But at the end of the day, no you ain’t better
However, forever I can beat you
And now that is what I intend to do

Your fat man, laugh when I told you I was once anorexic
Ten ****ing baguettes in one ****ing lunch time, pathetic
Smells like someone’s whacked ya across the face with a wet dog, even a fish
And there’s so much more, so just listen to this

Never ever should you try to display me
And yes I know you must ****ing hate me
But when I slag you off to your face, every ****ing body rates me
Well guess what no one likes ya, ya see, ya see, ya see

I think you must think I’m thick of thick
But you always think you’re it, and I see past it
Flab them chicken fillets around
I bet if you didn’t try to wear tight clothes then you fat would hit the ground

You can’t beat me, you’ll just have to put up with
For now I just adapt and live
And now whilst you bullshit between two
I still want **** all to do with you

Never ever should you try to display me
And yes I know you must ****ing hate me
But when I slag you off to your face, every ****ing body rates me
Well guess what no one likes ya, ya see, ya see, ya see

You think I’m great and that I like you (Err Mate)
Well only one of them is true (Ain’t The Second One Darling)
Yeah you guessed right, I hate your stupid baguette eating personality (That’s True)
And from you the only wish I have is to be free (Right Now)

Can’t get a life and make some of your own friends
Coz no one ****ing likes ya, even from ya own ends
I bet you lost all the ones you could’ve ever had from bitching and bullshit
And doing loads of ****ing fanny fitting

Never ever should you try to display me
And yes I know you must ****ing hate me
But when I slag you off to your face, every ****ing body rates me
Well guess what no one likes ya, ya see, ya see, ya see

Fake
Snake
Liar
The reason why I hate
Hate so much it shows
And for you my hate only grows

Never ever should you try to display me
And yes I know you must ****ing hate me
But when I slag you off to your face, every ****ing body rates me
Well guess what no one likes ya, ya see, ya see, ya see

Never ever should you try to display me
And yes I know you must ****ing hate me
But when I slag you off to your face, every ****ing body rates me
Well guess what no one likes ya, ya see, ya see, ya see

Never ever should you try to display me
And yes I know you must ****ing hate me
But when I slag you off to your face, every ****ing body rates me
Well guess what no one likes ya, ya see, ya see, ya see

Please Comment On It.

Elo, any comments...

It's longgg, and the title makes me giggle.
&WAY too much swearing. It ruins the song.

Whilst reading it I thought of N-Dubz :\
I suppose that's up to you whether it's a compliment or not.

BUT YEAH.
well done :D
Wow @ all those albums.

Is that a rap?

Nope, rap to me deserves a c on the front.

I Like It [Written On 20th November 2008]
She’s the apple of my eye
Just filling my appetite
Doing what she’s there for
Trying to grip my hand
Take me to the dance floor

But there’s one very big problem

He’s Mr Best Mate
And she’s Mrs Play Away
She’s flirtatious and dirty
Has kinky ideas as if she’s thirty
She doesn’t want him
She wants me instead
It looks quite dim
But apparently, I’m the one to bed
And guess what
I like it

I like it

Yes I like

I don’t need a girlfriend right this minute
I class myself as taken
People used to think I was frigid
But I think she’s laid me in heaven

He’s been a best mate for me since primary
But now his chicks got in the way
Guess what if she tells me to sit
I stay
And I hope she says play

He’s Mr Best Mate
And she’s Mrs Play Away
She’s flirtatious and dirty
Has kinky ideas as if she’s thirty
She doesn’t want him
She wants me instead
It looks quite dim
But apparently, I’m the one to bed
And guess what
I like it

I like it

I like it

Yes I like it
He’s Mr Best Mate
And she’s Mrs Play Away
She’s flirtatious and dirty
Has kinky ideas as if she’s thirty
She doesn’t want him
She wants me instead
It looks quite dim
But apparently, I’m the one to bed
And guess what
I like it

I like it
When you run your fingers down my back
I like it
When you call me on the sly
I like it
Because you
I like it
You and under your underwear

I like it

I like it

You see one thing remains the same
I like it how you play this game
And I love it how you say my name
Just that sends shivers down my spine
Yes, to my life at the moment you’re the shine
Like polish to shoes
Keep me on my toes
But I like the fact we have
I like it when I call you mine
And even if there is someone else, so long as you’re with me that’s fine

Yes I like it

Your powerful
Cast a spell
Cast your eyes
Sunset surprise
Now I’m trapped
I think I love you
In fact I know I do
And now I know
I like it
I dunno what to coz
I like the risk
I like life how it is
I dunno why
I just like it

I like it

He’s Mr Best Mate
And she’s Mrs Play Away
She’s flirtatious and dirty
Has kinky ideas as if she’s thirty
She doesn’t want him
She wants me instead
It looks quite dim
But apparently, I’m the one to bed
And guess what
I like it

Yes I like it
In fact
I love it

He’s Mr Best Mate
And she’s Mrs Play Away
She’s flirtatious and dirty
Has kinky ideas as if she’s thirty
She doesn’t want him
She wants me instead
It looks quite dim
But apparently, I’m the one to bed
And guess what
I like it

He’s Mr Best Mate
And she’s Mrs Play Away
She’s flirtatious and dirty
Has kinky ideas as if she’s thirty
She doesn’t want him
She wants me instead
It looks quite dim
But apparently, I’m the one to bed
And guess what
I like it

I like it
Yes I like it
I like it

Is it rap?

New song people, comments please.

I think there are some points where you're trying to make lines rhyme and as a result you're left with lyrics that make little sense (for example: "She's flirtatious and dirty/ Has kinky ideas as if she's thirty.")

I quite like the anger behind some of the lyrics though, so keep up ze good verk.

Your trying too hard too rhyme. They aren't telling a fluent story, and I am not keen on swearing in songs.

Very little of my songs have even just teh one swear word in them. And rhyme is a problem, but when you read Hey Daddy, you'll see that's my best song.
And the life is another good one.

Four Morning's [Wrritten On 12th February 07]
You leave me early in bed at seven some days
Tredding on eggshells when you’re back again
It’s like there’s a message behind you’re strange ways
But whatever it is, just come out with it, because you’re driving me insane

Sat waiting up for you to come home nearly all night
I’m so tired by eleven, but you’re like bat
Walk in at three in the morning, when there’s no light
Saying you were out clubbing, just walk over me like a door mat

Girl
I tuck you in when you are cold
But Girl
Sometimes I need you there to hold
Girl
I will be there for you
But Girl
It works both ways; you need to be there for me too
And Girl
It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

We go together like materials and stitching
Made to be sewn together
When other sees us, they don’t ever start flinching
I know we have the power to last forever

I don’t wanna fight all night so I try
Keeping sanity all the damn time
But you’re breaking me to the point I cry
Our relationships on the rocks, its far from fine

Girl
I tuck you in when you are cold
But Girl
Sometimes I need you there to hold
Girl
I will be there for you
But Girl
It works both ways; you need to be there for me too
And Girl
It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

I love you too much to ever let you go
But sometimes I just think you don’t know
So now I’m gonna work a little hard to show
I’ll be your lover and I’ll be your pro

Just remember love works both ways, all day
No one has a magic switch, we don’t just turn it off
So from now on, I don’t give a damn what people say
You’re the one I love so the rest of the haters can just bugger off

Girl
I tuck you in when you are cold
But Girl
Sometimes I need you there to hold
Girl
I will be there for you
But Girl
It works both ways; you need to be there for me too
And Girl
It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

Girl
I tuck you in when you are cold
But Girl
Sometimes I need you there to hold
Girl
I will be there for you
But Girl
It works both ways; you need to be there for me too
And Girl
It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

It will be me and you
You and I
I will find time for your mates too
And I promise when they’re taking the piss I won’t sigh

Yeah babe
Four mornings

I will never let you slip easily
I will love you peacefully
Hold you tight no matter what
Its your life and that’s gonna be what

Girl
I tuck you in when you are cold
But Girl
Sometimes I need you there to hold
Girl
I will be there for you
But Girl
It works both ways; you need to be there for me too
And Girl
It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

Girl
I tuck you in when you are cold
But Girl
Sometimes I need you there to hold
Girl
I will be there for you
But Girl
It works both ways; you need to be there for me too
And Girl
It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

It was only four mornings ago I was prepared to tell you goodbye

Album 3 has a theme of the elements of the world.

Any comments on the latest song?

Four Morning, the chorus makes me sing 'Girl' by Destiny Child in my head :P

Hey Daddy (The Scars You Carefully Placed On Me) [Written On 13th March 2008]
Hey daddy, this is what you made of me
Should a been proud of me
But your weird ways tell me you’re ashamed of me

I know
It’s the 21st century
But ya didn’t need to ditch me
So sad
Cuddled by my own arms
Your lies just couldn’t get ya outta this one

Anger flows through my veins
And it comes out at the wrong people
In many ways
All because of you
So get your head out of the clouds
And realize what ya’ve done
After all
In case you’ve forgotten
I’m still your son

No missed calls
Eight months after the first weekend missed
The first move had to come from nana
I may not’ve seen the letter
But I can imagine what it said
Questions
Never answered
Running around my head

Hey daddy, this is what you made of me
Should a been proud of me
But your weird ways tell me you’re ashamed of me

Your pure evil
This is what you told me
Her life’s nearly over
We’ll wait for her to be dead
That way you’re next to the throne
For a three bedroom home

Many a time
I’ve been sat waiting beside the phone
Waiting to go home
After all the lies you filled my head with
My mother was still the one I had to live with

But if the lies were true, I dunno what I would do
To you

Some might say this was destiny
But it didn’t have to be
But don’t ever apologize, your so full of it
I love you
Is eight letters
But so is bullshit
Delete me my number like you deleted me from your life
And guess what I’m never gonna sigh
Well a sigh of relief
That I never have to see you again

Hey daddy, this is what you made of me
Should a been proud of me
But your weird ways tell me you’re ashamed of me

Hey daddy, this is what you made of me
Should a been proud of me
But your weird ways tell me you’re ashamed of me

Let me paint a picture
Get the brush and the colours
You best not do this to others
By a string of mothers
Make them feel as though they’re the ones doing wrong
You must love the attention
With this ****ing song
Brian’s a better dad than you, so get over it
Like I said don’t apologize
Because you’re just full of bullshit
CSA can’t do anything
Well I’ve gotta do something
To make you see
See the scars you’ve left all over me

Hey daddy, this is what you made of me
Should a been proud of me
But your weird ways tell me you’re ashamed of me

Hey daddy, this is what you made of me
Should a been proud of me
But your weird ways tell me you’re ashamed of me

^^^^
My best song to date apparently.

I can't tell if they're are good or not with no music. :/

Are the lyrics ok?

Well, as I said, I can't tell.
e.g if you played the lyrics from 'Stairway to Heaven' to the 'Milkshake' music it wouldnt work so I really can't say

6 New Songs Tomorrow.

New songs?