[Shaun]

117th Place: Carmen Carrera (Season 3) - finished 5th (!?)

[size=2]I know I said earlier that there was no one on my list, who went past episode 7, until my 103rd queen but that's generally because every time I remember Carmen Carrera I am stunned that she made it as far as she did. Every time I would rewatch season 3 - and that's a lot because it's a fantastic season - I am honestly baffled each episode she is called 'safe'. As the first season to feature Michelle Visage, a fellow New Jersey girl, I can't help but feel a huge hometown bias helped keep Carmen in the game, and the decision to bring Carmen back when only one episode had passed after her first elimination is...probably the most inexplicable in the show's history.

I could, and am tempted to, break this down into an episode-by-episode account of why Carmen SUCKED but I'd be here all day. Let's stick to some highlights:

1) She survives a double-shantay with Yara Sofia. Not only this, but she's told to shantay first. Because she spent the lipsync walking over to the judges' table and kissing Johnny Weir and Santino!? Whilst Yara ripped her dress off and actually did cheerleading? [Kandy Ho wtf.mp3] All this for a PSA video challenge where the queens are told to send support to the troops overseas. Carmen spends her time dawdling and eventually walks off-set with time to spare. To me that's bad attitude. But eh.
2) Similarly walks away from Rita Rudner during the stand-up comedy challenge and manages to escape unscathed from any comments about unprofessionalism. Is safe this episode and actually delivers one of her best performances in the show (hell, the only good one).
3) Literally every runway being a variation on nudity and minimal sewing/creativity, and getting a free pass every single damn time. The only time it sends her home is when she attempts to transfer it onto her military makeover partner.
4) Completely invisible in every performance challenge: do you remember her in the QNN news task? Her workout routine? Drag Queens in Outer Space? Her J-Lo on Snatch Game? Her reggae version of 'Superstar'? No, didn't think so.
5) No better at the visual challenges - I've already mentioned the task she's sent home (a second time) for, but her Christmas runway is literally a red bikini with a sprig of mistletoe above her ass-cheeks. Her princess cake runway, one of the few times she's comparatively "dressed", is an ugly lime-green monstrosity with a mountain of tulle balanced on her shoulder. Her space-age couture is a giant ring of hair that's slowly ripping her scalp off

But even if you overlook her lacklustre performances, it's her personality that lands her this low for me. Season 3 is, of course, dominated by Heathers vs. Boogers drama and whilst I certainly don't believe Carmen to be the worst of the bunch (quite the opposite in fact: she's seen talking to Yara/Alexis a lot and even falls for Shangela's mindgames with the RuPaulapalooza challenge and begins to doubt Manila's friendship), her bitchy throwaway comments about other queens being "ugly" just smacked of entitled pretty-girl with no kindness. And then of course there's the off-show spat with RuPaul over the use of the "Oooh girl, you've got she-mail!" line every episode, despite her 'advocacy for trans rights' consisting of... 'look passing and you're ok'. And attacking miss TS Madison for "giving trans women a bad name" or some nonsense.

Like I've said before, she might not deserve to be this low... but it seems only fair given she wants to pretty much erase her history with the show now, and whilst she is indeed a beautiful model... there's really nothing else to her.

Memorable quote(s): "No foam here!"
Best Runway(s): Her USA Runway, where she channels Dita von Teese, by a mile.
Best Moment(s): Deciding that she needs to do a walk-on intro to her workout routine DVD, without any prompts from Ru <3
Bottoming for Raja in the Paula Abdul - Straight Up lipsync, whilst Alexis Mateo expresses disgust at the softcore porn <3