US Nation Surrenders To Chinese Balloon
WASHINGTON—Bowing down before the floating intruder mere hours after it
entered American airspace, the entire U.S. nation reportedly surrendered
Friday to the Chinese balloon spotted hovering over Montana. “Today, I speak
to the Great Balloon to say unequivocally: the country is yours,” said
President Joe Biden in a Rose Garden address in which he—along with the
Joint Chiefs of Staff and Secretary of State Antony Blinken—lowered
themselves to their knees and pledged fealty to the spherical white invader in
exchange for mercy. “You can have all our states, all our protectorates. I
have told our military to stand down, and I’d advise all 350 million Americans
to do so, as well. There is no way to counter this unstoppable display of
force. Please, you have already outwitted us. Take pity on our people.” Biden
went on to say he was consider offering an olive branch to the balloon by
sacrificing Vice President Harris.
https://www.today.com/video/suspecte...s-162549317520