Day 1 .......... Thursday 6:15 am
Bathtime
The Nomat' tes familly have been gathered in the lounge for a de-brief on how to get oldest son Shaun to his weekly bath. Dad has insisted on the early meeting to make sure the exersise goes to plan after last weeks shocking balls up saw Shaun escape out the back door normaly guarded by Christina who at the time was tending to a seemingly homeless butterfly. Shaun ran off to his friend Magic's house and wasnt returned home for 3 days.
Dad... "Ok, are we all here now"?
Familly ...Yes dad
Mom. Of course we are love, you can see us for gods sake.
Dad... Please love ,, dont make this more difficult, we have to get this right today, lets work together for once ..OK?
Everyone rolls there eyes, and there is a brief muttering amonst the sleepy group.
Dad.. Right glad to see everyone in there protective stab vests and protective helmets,,, errrrrrrrmmmm... Christina where your helmet love?
Christina... Oh dad is it really important I have school soon and its double history first thing.
Annie, bunk it Tina I always did, history is a subject thats never going to change, catch up next week,?
Christina... I cant do that
Getting really frustrated now Dad steps in
Dad... Ok girls stop it now...go and get the helmet Christina and hurry up.
The familly wait..
Billy.. "dont know why we bother I'd let the smelly minger rot for another week"
Mom.. Oh Billy dont be so cruel
Dad..yes thanks Billy dont forget we had this trouble with you too, and it worked, so we carry on.
Christina arrives putting on her helmet, and Dad flips over the blackboard with a detailed room by room map of the house drawn on it.
Dad.. Ok people this is the plan, at 6:30 am we strike quickly before Shaun properly wakes, Sia you will guard the front door no one goes out or comes in clear?
Sia... Crystal..dad
Dad........ Christina, back door and this time no distractions..clear
Christina....... yeah yeah whatever
Mom,,, darling do we need all this honestly?
Dad... YEs, I think we do, after last week we agreed it would NOT happen again, now please ... we ALL need to take this seriously.
The giggles subside...
Dad... Annie you will take up Shaun breakfast to his room and place it on the table and then take up the rear to prevent him running back and shutting himself back in the room... clear
Annie...YES DAD!!!
Dad... Hannah you will be in the bathroom behind the shower curtain ready to run the bath once the subject is restrained and covered, clear?
Hannah... Crystal dad
Dad, Billy once he's in the bathroom and I have a tight grip on subjects shoulders, you will then restrain the subjects legs with my snake belt uncle Ted got me from Las Vegas last August, you know the cr*p looking fake leather one...
Mom...Excuse me, but my brother does not buy rubbish
Dad, I'm joking petal,, relax ok dear,, I'm sure its genuine.
Billy,, (under his breath) and I'm sure its plastic
Dad.. you clear Billy
Billy, on the belt.. yes Dad very clear ..(he laughs)
Dad....... Good, and finally darling if you'll follow Annie into the room and were using the story of can you help find my contact lenses that have fallen in the sink bait, to get the subject into the bath.
Mom... yes honey, and I wish you'd refer to our son as Shaun, hes not a subject.
Dad... Just following procedure sweet heart, thats all, I want this done properly, OK swat team, take your positions and syncronise watches, it is now 6:26 am exersise will comence at 6:30 am.. are we all clear?
Nomat'tes Familly.... Crystal!!!!
Dad, Ok team take up positions and good luck
The Familly huddle together for a group high 5, before seperating to thier positions... Shaun remains snoring in the boys bedroom.
Annie starts the short walk upstairs with a bowl of Sugar Puffs and half a bannana on a tray.
The End........... for now
