[30stone]

Dear Andy,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but the mafia wants you. I think I realized it when I threw up in your sock drawer and I saw you outside of your office pull the clothes off into [/b]my knee caps[/b].
I'm sure you're Cowardly enough to understand that I may pee my pants.
I'm returning the couch cushions & the pictures from Vegas to you, but I'll keep your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory.
You should also know will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.

Go drown yourself.
Van Perfect

Darn that took ages lol, should have put numbers in the top bit so i could know where i was putting answers.