Banned
|
|
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 5,845
|
|
Banned
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 5,845
|
Ohh, I really really like it. I think you have used some good words and metaphors, but to one bit seem a bit predictable?
''I crawl towards the exit, seeking air to breathe,
praying for escape from the tangled webs I weave''
No offense, but I swear similar stuff has featured in alot of poems, and I think to improve it, maybe bits like this good be revised?
Otherwise, I love it! Alot better than what I could do! Well done!
|