[Shaun]

This is Helga Walkure with her new song 'LemonJam is such a ****ing awful person'

[Sirens haunt the arena glaring. A helicopter arrives with Helga Walkure in full viking gear hanging out the side. She throws a bomb into a pre-set up mosque which explodes. She hair-flicks her pigtails and belts some Aguilera vocals]

EIN FURHRARARARARARARAARRARARARARAAAAA

[She lands and struts forward with her bondage laden backing dancers]

Some say I'm bad
Some say I'm misunderstood
But oh no baby you just know that I'm no good
See, there's some people who think that I have lost some screws
But if I'm really honest I just ****ing hate the jews.

[She glares a la the HARRY emoticon as the audience look at her in shock]

Ohai blonde haired blue eyed guy
Let's get electric
You better be packing some
Or I'll get anti-semetic
And if things do get ugly then I'll only spare the purer
Some say that I'm a bitch, I just say that I'm Ein Furher qt~

[After her thighs of steel have grinded the backup dancer pretty much to a pulp she struts to a side podium and /bates furiously]

Love put them gas taps on
Play me out some tunes
But no Gypsy Violinists
Or I'll violate you with a spoon
Some people say I'm wrong and that I should know much better.
But getting these hoes gassed gets me wetter, wetter, wetter.

Ohai blonde haired blue eyed guy
Let's get electric
You better be packing some
Or I'll get anti-semetic
[She begins to strut up some stairs]
And if things do get ugly then I'll only spare the purer
Some say that I'm a bitch, I just say that I'm Ein Furher qt~

[The music slows down to a string quartet as she stands holding onto two showers]

And when these days are over baby,
You'll be liberated
But just for now, 2baha are here
And you're all gonna get out-/bate-d

[She turns on the showers as gas comes out and she begins to run down the steps as the music gets faster again. She reaches the bottom to find Ghandi and Mother Theresa, who she Hi-5's]

This is what you *****s wanted!

[They all begin to dance again]

Ohai blonde haired blue eyed guy
Let's get electric
You better be packing some
Or I'll get anti-semetic
And if things do get ugly then I'll only spare the purer
Some say that I'm a bitch, I just say that I'm Ein Furher qt~

[Fin. The audience are horrified.]

If you vunt to vote for me please call 0800-ICH-WERDE-SIE-FINDEN-UND-WERDE-SIE-IN-IHREM-SCHLAF-SIE-HABGIERIGE-HUREN-VERGASEN qt~

\bate