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Nothing in excess
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Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Here
Posts: 7,496
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Nothing in excess
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Here
Posts: 7,496
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- Ban all clothing
- Ban the consumption of non-alcoholic beverages on a nighttime
- Lace their tapwater with Spanish Fly
- Broadcast everything that is said in the snug to a select group of housemates
- Tell one of the housemates their family died in a horrific accident and then tell them it was a joke two weeks later.
- Bring back Boot Camp, where two housemates will be appointed as sergeants and the rest privates. The privates' successful completion of the tasks will keep the sergeants safe and put the rest of the house up for eviction.
- Set a secret task where the housemate charged with organising the shopping list is required to wipe off half the items off the shopping list when he/gets into the diary room and replace them all with vodka and cigarettes.
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No matter that they act like senile 12-year-olds on the Today programme website - smoking illegal fags to look tough and cool. No matter that Amis coins truly abominable terms like 'the age of horrorism' and when criticised tells people to 'fuck off'. Surely we all chuckle at the strenuous ennui of his salon drawl. Didn't he once accidentally sneer his face off?
- Chris Morris - The Absurd World of Martin Amis
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