Q:How many Man United fans does it take to change a lightbulb at Old Trafford?
A:Two, one to change the bulb and another to drive him up from London
Q: What do you call 20 Manchester United Fans skydiving from an aeroplane?
A: Diahorrea.
Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, a Manchester United Fan from Manchester, and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a £50 note. Who gets it ?
A: The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythical creatures.
Q: What do Manchester United Fans use for birth control?
A: Their personalities.
Q Why are Man United hoping to build a 40 thousand seater stadium in Brighton
A So they can be nearer their fan base
Q: What has Old Trafford on a Saturday afternoon at 4.45pm got in common with Wormwood Scrubs Prison?
A: They are both full of cockneys trying to get out.
Feel free to add some more folks!