Sticks, you are, undoubtedly, a class act my friend!!
Anyway, through the powers of telepathy, I have received this virtual message from the erstwhile International Popstar:
Hiya!
Yeah, this really is your actual Paul 'Clarkey' Clarke here.
I was absolutely gutted to hear from Stuart that some prat has posted on your site, pretending to me. That just isn't on. It's totally out of order, and it's just not on, not on at all.
It's really, really wierd. I mean, just what is this guy or girl on?
So, although you know I have been keeping a pretty low profile, and to be honest, I would like to keep it that way, I just thought it would be nice to say HIYA!
I am fine, we both are fine, and we are still living our own little lives in our own little home. It's brilliant!
What's really nice is that we can do what we want, whenever we want - although sometimes we still like to pretend we're hiding...
. Helen likes that kind of stuff and I am totally cool with that.
Helen likes looking after me, and I like looking after her. I am a really good cook now. I mean, I always was, and I don't care what they said in the house. Mate, my fish pie is the dog's b******s! It is legend. No, you really should try it, it is BLINDING! Well, of course you can't, but you know what I mean. It's Gastro-tastic!
I am still designing car doors. It is my skill, so I use it. I am also working on designs for bonnet lids as well now. My ultimate ambition is of course to design the definitive car of the 21st century, and why not? Anything is possible.
Failing that, my dad has sent some designs I done to George Lucas. It's for a new Millenium Falcon. You would not believe how brilliant it is. Dad says George will be really impressed. So look out for my name on the credits of the next SW film!
Course, that would be absolutely fantastic, because then I could help Helen realise another of her ambitions.....and take her to the Oscars. I can see it now. She'll be in pink of course!
Still, it suits her, bless her. I ain't wearing no matching cumerband though, I don't care what she says!
Right, well, I think that's about all I have got to say to you all, except maybe thanks for all the postings, it's brilliant that you still remember us. Mind you, one or two of you should get help. That ROB sounds as if she is one file short of a folder if you ask me!
Now, I am going back to get on with my life, nice and anonomous stylie, and may the force be with you, yeah?
Cool!