Hi Jess
I'm so sorry you and your friend suffer from it yet you sound so young
it is a horrible thing to go through, but stay strong hun you will hopefully find something in your life that takes you out from it even for a little while.
And yes i agree with you regards to Dee which was the main reason for my post, i can be the same when i go out the house shopping or for the odd lunch with my daughter etc i put on a "face", but she is in the house 24/7 if she had depression she would be in the diary room for half of it pouring her heart out although we wouldnt see it, i think BB would pull her out for it on health reasons, but she seems fine to me.
Probably a bit old for you but there's a song that's called "Tears of a clown" by Smokey Robinson very old motown song but it's very true, the beginning lyrics are ..
Now if there's a smile on my face
It's only there trying to fool the public
But when it comes down to fooling you
Now honey that's quite a different subject
But don't let my glad expression
Give you the wrong impression
'Cause really I'm sad, Oh I'm sadder than sad
Well I'm hurt and I want you so bad
Like a clown I appear to be glad
Well they're some sad things known to man
But ain't too much sadder than
The tears of a clown
when there's no one around
Anyway thx for your post much love to you and your mum and doggies
Keep ya chin up
take care x