[Romantic Old Bird]

I watched my recording of last night's programme this morning.

What can I say? Boring, awful script, still an incredibly bad impersonation of Helen, not even vaguely funny.

I suppose if that is the best bit of dazzling wit they can come up with for them, we are unlikely to be subjected to many more.

It is necessary to have some semblance of fondness for a character, or at least a grudging respect for them, for any impression to work effectively.

Whatever you think about Posh and Becks, you have to admit the lad can play, and Posh has sold a few records, so I think he acknowledges that in his view of them as a couple.

Mc Gowan even seems to treat the Hamiltons more kindly, and they are IMHO, complete bloody parasites, who are cashing on as caricatures of themselves.

What on earth did poor old Paul and Helen do to him? The inkling came the other week when he introduced them as 'famous for being alive'

I think Mc Gowan should go and live with Elizabeth and all the other quiet introspective people he seems to admire so much, and live in a house under surveillance for 9 weeks.

Either the cameramen would become catatonic, or the producers would have to have the show pulled off after 48 hours. Even if that didn't happen the numbers would diminish rapidly, as week by week, one after another would poke out their own eyes, throw themselves onto kitchen knives, or cast themselves into the pool with weights attached to their ankles, just to escape from the sheer, soul sapping mediocrity of it all.

Or, they might just loose the will to live.

Come to think of it, it's a compliment not to be liked by him.