The Tube
Oh dear! What cheer, it's seventh heaven,
The Tube being open 24/7.
Tramps and stray cats now have somewhere to kip,
But in administration there will be many a slip.
So you're bound to see, when using the tube,
More Bums and Pussies and the occasional boob.
And some will flock here but not to catch trains,
Like junkies in toilets putting needles in veins,
And 'working Girls who'll think it is neat,
That they can meet punters without walking the street.
Extra cops will be needed, with crooks to be nicked,
'Cos of drunks whose pockets will be definitely picked.
But all city revelers will take special delight.
That they don't need taxis to get home at night.
Like football supporters in the 'Smoke' for a match,
Who stay out knowing there's a train they can catch.
And with no crowding on trains which run late at night,
All can get aboard (unless you're non-white).
And the racists who stopped a black man getting on,
Wouldn't have been so brave had it been 'One on One'.
So let's hope this innovation is not just one big boob,
Which will take more problem solving than a Rubik's Cube.
It might be a success or it might fail,
But I must dash now Hog - I've a taxi to hail.
