Quote:
Originally Posted by Ammi
..you say damned if they do and damned if they don’t but it’s not that at all...it’s about appropriate action if action is needed...and writing to and threatening all parents is neither appropriate nor helpful..all schools are reliant on the trust and support of their parents to work together in a partnership... and how would this happen if the school is threatening to report to the police something which is entirely a parent’s decision ...how is that in the interest of any child...a primary school child playing an 18+ video game..(whether anyone think that’s appropriate or not..)..is not any indication of neglect within the home, there would have to be some other factors involved for that to be the case...
...maybe that child has an older sibling who plays the games and maybe sometimes that sibling lets them have a go..?...maybe it’s the parent’s game and the parent themselves let their child play on it under their supervision..?...maybe they’ve decided..(as the parent..).. that the child is able to cope with that..(because all children are different..)...If a child were to reveal that they played ********** game at home and they thought about death all of the time when they played it..?...then that would be a safeguarding concern...if a child were to be persistently late for school and tired/hungry because their lateness meant that they never had time for breakfast... and they revealed that they hardly ever got sufficient sleep because they were busy playing ************ game every night and really late...?...then that would be a safeguarding concern...and those concerns would require some action from the school and that action would vary depending on the individual situation...in the first instance it may just be to have a chat with the parents..and obviously to discuss a solution...maybe outside organisations would be involved in some situations because it could be that the family does need a bit of help...and that’s what it’s really all about/not punishing..but identifying when help is needed in a family/what the help is and helping that family to get it..parents as a rule in most cases don’t neglect their children/they try their best to parent their children in the best ways they can... but sometimes they can struggle for various reasons....what it isn’t about and what isn’t helpful to anyone involved is to ‘punish’ or to threaten to punish parents ....and I would think also unhelpful to the police who have limited resources...
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Hi Ammi,
It is not very often I disagree with your views, and this is no exception.
I actually agree with a lot of the points you are raising, but I must point out that you are misinterpreting what I actually wrote. I did say:
"and this
just might be an indicator of potentially more grave 'parental neglect'."
As opposed to definitely in all cases.
I am not condemning all parents who let their children access, play or even watch as bystanders the playing of 18 games or films - because with intelligent, mature and responsible parents, their judgement and their personal knowledge of their children is far more credible than any teacher's 'second hand' opinions.
However - not ALL parents are intelligent, mature and responsible, and not all parents care for their kids in the way you claim.
What is an innocuous revelation from one 6 year old regarding playing 18 rated games, may be have far more alarming connotations in another 6 year old revealing the same fact.
I believe that in the case of child neglect or even abuse, it is forgiveable if the schools err on the side of caution.
I would not take offence if I was a parent who allowed my child to watch or play 18 rated games and the school - or even Social Services or Police -contacted me as a 'follow up' to my child revealing as much in school, because I have no fear that in every possible respect, my kids are patently not neglected.
On the other hand, if such an action exposes just one family where neglect or abuse is being perpetrated, and remedial action can be invoked, then I feel the school's actions will be justified.
I do agree that 'contacting the parents' is a far more diplomatic alternative to 'contacting the police' and I did write that the 'ultimatum could have been worded better', but I stand by the points I raised about schools having custody of our children during weekdays for longer than we have, and that 'responsibility' without 'authority' is a recipe for disaster.