[Time to Sleigh]

Should we wrap this launch up then? There are still 8 more celebrities to put in there, it's already going crazy in there but I think we should stir the pot just a little bit more. It's housemate number 9

(VT)

"I'm back bitches! Ya it's me frenchy. What makes me an ultimate celebrity housemate? Maybe the fact I don't give a crap about anyone else. I think it's most important that I'm happy. If that means offending people and hurting their feelings so what. I stirred it up so much before, I went wild. But I had so much more to give. I'm so happy to be going back in and will stir it up so much more. Warning to everyone. Frenchy is back"

(Frenchy enters cell 3)

Frenchy: I have only just come here and end up in a prison cell. Maybe they know how much trouble I will cause. I pity the people who have to live with me. This whole floor will be covered with my makeup. I think this room should be pink big brother"

Yikes! I also pity the housemates joining her. Should we find out who they are? It's housemate number 10

"It's me. Brad Pitt of the dance world. I so regret saying that comment. It still hasn't died. It's so cringworthingly bad! Why am I going back in? Simply because I am competitive, I didn't win last time. I should have. I really do think I deserved it. I feel if it wasn't for Audley I could have won and Gary of course. He was such hard work. I got to enter the civilian series as part of hotel bb. That was fun. I'm ready to go back in for longer. Yeah get me in there"

(James Jordan enters cell 3)
Frenchy: James!!! How are you?
James: oh nooo! Are you going to behave this time?
Frenchy: nope
James: haha me neither. All we need now is Leslie
Frenchy: I hope not bitter old man

Well Leslie won't be joining them, but housemate number 11 will be!

(VT)

"Hello. It's me Luisa Zissman. Yeah I feel I do deserve to be in ultimate celebrity big brother. I think I was one of the best things about my series. I'm fun, flirty, I can be fiery. I'm hoping Lionel Blair isn't going in. I want to break all the rules this time I don't want any fuddy duddy to stop me. Who wants to see a bunch of people sitting around drinking tea talking about the weather?! This isn't bb16! I want it to be a compete orgy in there. I'm coming!!"

(Luisa enters cell 3)

Luisa: how at you both? Nice to see you
Frenchy: nice to meet you. I'm frenchy. Who are you? What do you do?
Luisa: I know who you are frenchy, we met on bots. Luisa and I guess I'm known for being a business entrepreneur that likes to be a bit wild
Frenchy: you sound fun
James: hiya Luisa. Nice to see you. I guess we are going to have a party in here with you two girls
Luisa: hell yes!

Should we put another one in? Housemate number 12!

(VT)

"Why-ay! Charlotte here! I'm proper buzzing to go back in to the house again. I wanna get mortal. Thankfully Janice battersby won't be in there this time to stop us! I'm goin to tear it up. I'm free, single and ready to mingle so you better put a bunch of hot toddy in there!"

(Charlotte enters cell 3)
James: I guess we won't be doing any sleeping tonight yet another wild girl! How are you Charlotte?
Charlotte: I'm buzzing. I proper need a wee though. Is that the only toilet! Ah sod it I don't care I gotta go
Luisa: you might wanna close the door!
Charlotte: na it's fine I wanna chat to you all. Ah no I need a poo now
Frenchy: please close the door
Charlotte: it's gonna proper smell like

Well I don't think that lot are going to mind sharing a cell are they? Should we fill our last cell? It's housemate number 13

(VT)

"I can't believe I'm coming back for more. Yes Denise welsh. I really embarrassed myself last time. I regret a lot of things. I still managed to win though which was nice. This time round I'm going to be in my best behaviour and act dignified. How long that will last I don't know! My children are mortified I'm going back in but I couldn't resist"

(Denise enters cell 4)

Denise: what's going on here? Have I been conned into going into some kind of rehab. Michael madsen said I needed help. These beds don't look very comfy

Thank goodness there isn't a hot tub in there! It's time for housemate number 14

(VT)

"What is ultimate celebrity big brother? Is that like what I did last time? Is is the same show or a different one? Is it with other people this time? I won last time I did the show, can I do it again I have absolutely no idea. It's time to have me back though, it's me Gary busey(honk!!)"

(Gary confusingly enters cell 4)
Denise: Gary how are you?
Gary: are you the new presenter?
Denise: no I'm not I'm a housemate
Gary: is it just us two
Denise: I think there may be more in other parts of the garden
Gary: sorry?
Denise: I think it's some kind of twist
Gary: I thought it would be the same people as last time
Denise: well that would be boring, we will have fun together
Gary: what's your name?
Denise: Denise
Gary: Dennis?
Denise: no not Dennis, Denise!
Gary: you look like a Dennis haha. I'm Gary
Denise: cheeky sod. Well it's nice to meet you Gary

That's going to be a fun one to watch. Should we leave it as that. Na let's get the 2 final housemates in there. Welcome housemates number 15

"Get it? Got it? Good! Yes it me Julie Goodyear. I guess I suprised people last time. Yes I'm old but it doesn't mean I have to sit on a chair knitting. I'm the life and soul of the party and that's not going to change. There was a lot of sensitive people last time that I managed to offend. Well sod them I will say whatever I think. I would rather be like that than two faced. Am I ready for round 2? I think so"

(Julie enters cell 4)
Denise: hello Julie long time no see
Julie: well thank goodness your the loose woman they went for and not Coleen
Denise: don't be cruel she is a good friend of mine
Julie: I better watch what I say then. Hello Gary?
Gary: who are you?
Julie: Julie Goodyear. Legendary soap actress
Gary: I don't view soap actors as proper actors
Denise: well done Gary you have managed to offend both of us in one go

Oh dear. That's going well. Time for one last housemate. It's housemate number 16

(VT)
"Good evening. It's me Shilpa. What can I say? My series of big brother went down in history but I don't want to dwell on that. I resolve things with Jade before she sadly passed away so I don't think it would be kind to bring it back up. I just hope this time round my experience will be a pleasant one"

(Shilpa enters cell 4)

Shilpa: oh my goodness. I can't live in here. What on earth are they doing. Nice to meet you all
Denise: wow Shilpa you look stunning
Shilpa: thankyou and so do you
Gary: what's your name?
Shilpa: Shilpa Shetty
Gary: I think ill struggle with that one. What do you do?
Shilpa: I'm a Bollywood actress
Gary: so we are all actors then. These only do soaps though
Julie: stop saying that! Nice to see you Shilpa. You must be one of the most famous in here
Shilpa: I don't know
Denise: I would love to know who else is in here! Bet there are a lot of big characters in here

Well there is indeed. That's our line up. Ultimate celebrity big brother starts now!!!