[Ammi]

..no, to revenge I think is to allow that person who has hurt you, to carry on controlling your emotions ..which is the only control we have really...although being cheated on is obviously such a negative thing..in a way in terms of how hurtful it is, it's also positive or you can take positive from it because it's allowed you to see that person so much more clearly..and someone that you wouldn't want to be a part of your life, in the same way they had been...

..I recall reading a book once..and the main character of the book was grieving for his much loved wife..they had been married for many years and he was completely lost without her...anyways, in sorting through her stuff, he found love letters and things that told him that she had been having a long term affair through their marriage, right from when he very first met her...wow, I can't imagine how that would feel..to feel that your whole life had been a 'lie' with that person and that there would never be any questions answered ..and the conflict of your love and grief and feelings of betrayal...


..I can understand though in some extremes other than the OP examples, how 'revenge' or maybe 'closure' would be something that some would feel they needed..if someone had hurt them so deeply that, that person already controlled their emotions and life...things like, child abuse or any relationship abuse ..when finding 'their control' of themselves again was too difficult/impossible, because of what was done to them...and maybe seeing that person not brought to justice, which does obviously happen...and things like torture would also be one...

..on the whole though and in a general way, I think that revenge or feelings of revenge are the most destructive to the people who feel them...don't 'walk away' as such, but hold on to what you have learned...