[kirklancaster]

Some of you may know that I write and have had very near misses with three previous spec script submissions in the past. Well I am currently pitching some more.

Here's a brief rundown:

'PRISON BREAK'

A sinister organisation called 'The European Community' - who have covert designs on on taking over the world, eradicating all Democracy, and installing a 'New World Order' - has trapped and imprisoned the United Kingdom Population by deceit and with the help of successive treasonous British Governments.

Enter the brilliant Nigel Farage who formulates a plan to free the UK from its chains.

Nigel recklessly but bravely takes on the all powerful EU's British Establishment lackeys who secretly control the BBC, ONS, CBI, FT, and the Media, but they are so desperate to preserve the 'Status Quo', they launch an unprecedented campaign of deceitul propaganda to destroy his credibility and convince the British public that they are better off staying in prison because: “outside prison the future is unknown and scary” (wooooo!)

Being a UK citizen, Nigel is imprisoned in the same penitentiary as the rest of the UK - 'The Foxed Raver' penitentiary - (so called because most of the inmates of the jail realise that they have been 'foxed' by the EU and the British Government and are 'raving' angry as a result.

Will Nigel succeed in his daring plan?

Or will the sinister EU and their treasonous British Government lackeys foil
the audacious escape bid?

Stay tuned to 'Prison Break' to find out.
………………………………………………………...

BANDOFSHEEP

Dodgy Dave - Dave Cameron, an ex second hand car dealer who SHOULD have served a 15 year sentence for High Treason and Crimes Against the State – drifts into the sleepy United Kingdom - a country also known as 'BandofSheep' because of the appalling apathy, lethargy, and gullibility of a lot of its citizens.

By stealth Dodgy Dave assumes the identity of a British Prime Minister and is hereafter known as Looks A. Hood – which is what he is.

Hood has his own way of doing things. Not for him the prerequisites of Fair Play, Truth, Loyalty, Honesty and Patriotism - No, being a crook, Hood has only personal monetary gain in mind, and he knows that being Prime Minister is the best way to ensure that objective.

Hood is soon joined by other crooks who have the same vested interests and they help him in his plan and help to keep his secret.

It is not long however, before Hood is suspected by one of his most senior deputies – Broke Locust – who is seething and resentful that he was not given the Prime Minister's job, and it is Broke who eventually openly opposes Hood in the hope of replacing him.

Bandofsheep looks to Hood to destroy a sinister criminal Multi National Corporation who are milking it dry and who are above the law because they have replaced most of the laws with their own and are in control of the rest.

The Corporation - Procter and Gambler - is run by a ruthless gambler named Fly Procter but Hood does not concern himself with Procter because Hood himself enjoys huge covert revenue from Procter's criminal enterprises.

Will BandofSheep be freed from the shackles of its Multi National Corporate masters?

Will Prime Minister Hood be exposed for his real criminal self?

Will Broke Locust – Hood's one time Deputy, and now greatest adversary succeed in ousting Hood and taking his job?

Stay tuned to 'BandofSheep' to find out.

I am also currently writing:

'GAME OF DRONES Zzzzzzzzzzzzz'

The plot of my latest series is very complex so I will not elaborate too much here. It is set in the fictional land of 'Westislost' (because it will be if something is not done soon) and involves several families all fighting each other and engaging in all manner of skullduggery to rule the land.

PRITI STORMBORN of the House PATELRYAN - a beautiful Queen who has lived in exile in Essex with her advisors and Dragons - is intent on reclaiming the country for the benefit of its oppressed populace. She has many titles including:

Breaker of Chains (Because she wants to free the EU enslaved UK and has written a book – 'Britannia Unchained')

The Unburnt – (Because, despite being a TRUE BLUE Conservative, she has emerged from the fires of Cameron indoctrination unscathed and with her integrity intact.)

Protector of the Realm (Someone HAS to protect it.)

Princess Priti recruits 'The Unbullied' an army of patriotic and fiercely loyal warriors who have all their genitalia intact despite many attempts to castrate them by the pro-EU media.

The Unbullied have an army of counterparts – 'The Sullied' - who fight for the EU, and these are led by Davidos Cameronyar, a weasel of a man who secretly never had any balls or integrity, but who has sullied his reputation by exposing himself as a liar and a cheat over his endorsement of the EU.

Davidos uses underhand tricks to further his ambition of preserving the status quo and keep Westislost under the yoke of the EU. Among these are wheeling out now almost decrepit ex-members of The Sullied – all who once held powerful positions but disgraced themselves. These include:

Greyed Worm – real name John of The House of Major, but Greyed Worm suits him better - a one time Leader of Westislost who betrayed his country when he used a deceitful trick taught to him by his mother to sign a treaty with the EU.

This treachery became known as the 'Ma's Trick Treaty.

Tor Ree Poster Boy - real name TonyBoy, the founder of the secret keep Blair Rich Project, and another ex-Leader of Westislost who sullied himself by deceitfully bringing the country to war by invading a foreign nation.

Tor Ree PosterBoy lied that the foreign country's Muslim ruler - Sodding Insane - had built secret weapons with which to destroy ALL the Christian Church Services in Westislost so Westislost invaded, but no Weapons Of Mass Destruction were ever found.

Other major characters in my script are:

NED STARK STARING BONKERS and his siblings Aryan, Santa and Brantub and Richesnone, and Ned's bastard John Snow White.

This family are so named because anyone who believes that the working classes – especially Notherners - will EVER get a fair crack of the whip in WESTISLOST never mind RULE it, has to be stark staring bonkers.

What do you think? Are my plots too far fetched?