My thanks to Ammi, Ashley, Cherie, Suze and Johnny, and HiJax and Marsh, for your wonderfully satisfying comments - your apprecition is better than a Pulitzer Prize.
I am now moved to post, in the near future, the full script of my wonderful
parody of the 'Wizard of Oz' - a tale about the UK during the abhorrent John Major's tenure as Prime Minister following the Thatcher years.
It is called; 'The Wishhard of Dross'. here's a part run down:
In it, following an accident, Dorothy and Toto are transported by a severe tornado - no, make that a Twister, a MAJOR TWISTER (John is his first name) to a land somewhere 'over the rainbow' - the 'Land of Dross' - a land of stark contrasts where 90% of the country live in appalling poverty and the leader of Dross and his minions live the high life.
Dorothy accidently kills the witch of the East when she lands.
As soon as Dorothy lands in Dross, she is greeted by the MUNCHSKINS - a people so named because they are so poverty-stricken that all they have to eat are the skins of butchered animals from the abattoirs of Dross which are 'graciously' donated to them by the 'CONS' party - the ruling party of Dross who live in the Emerald Palace - all of whom of course, dine well on the meat.
The Mayor of the Munchskins explains that the Cons have had two terms of government and that each term saw life get even tougher for the citizens of Dross.
Dorothy is incensed that any rulers could treat their people in such an unfair manner and asks how such mean, selfish, and uncaring people could ever get voted into power and how Dross ever got into such a state.
The Mayor of the Munchskins explains that the ruling party l- The CONS - lied to the people - promising to solve all and any problems and to govern Dross for the good of ALL its citizens, but then, once elected, they shirked from dealing with such problems and turned their backs on the people.
"Why, that's downright cowardly and YELLOW of them. But I'm surprised that you all fell for their lies and voted them in for a second term" remarked Dorothy.
The Mayor continues that the Cons are very adept liars and very polished conmen.
"So they are SLICK" commented Dorothy.
"Yes, indeed" agrees the Mayor "They have a dishonest CODE they live by, and I'm afraid that is what got them elected twice."
Dorothy asks; "You mean that's how they got to the Emerald City?"
"Yes" replies the Mayor:
"They followed The YELLOW SLICK CODE"
(groan
)
At this all the Munchskins begin singing and dancing - "Follow The Yellow Slick Code".
The singing and dancing is interrupted when three men appear - they are Eric Heffer, Tony Ben and Ken Livingstone.
"Excuse me" says Ken to the Mayor. "Could you tell us how we can find a place called 'Middle Ground'?
The Mayor shakes his head. "Why are you looking for it?"
"Our party leader rollocked us and said that our politics are too 'Red' and that our extreme Leftie views were the reason why we were slipping down the opinion polls. He told us to 'Feck Off' and not to come back until we had all found the 'Middle Ground'. "
"Yes" says Eric. "And when we asked him where we would find some 'Middle Ground' he said that we might as well look Over The Rainbow' - So here we are".
Suddenly the three men and the Munchskins become terrified and flee as a very mean looking witch - who looks just like Maggie Thatcher - lands on a broomstick in front of Dorothy.
"Run Dorothy" cries the Mayor "It's Onger - The Wicked Witch of The West. You killed her sister"
The witch cackles and violently grasps Dorothy's arm.
"Why you're not cold like I imagined witches to be" Exclaims Dorothy.
"Of course I'm not cold you idiot" replies Onger. "I invaded the Falklands didn't I? Everyone knows I'm a warm Onger" (another groan?
)
"Listen, you little twat" Onger goes on. "I saw you with those three loony leftie Red's who are slipping down the Opinion Polls. Tell me where they've gone or I'll have you flogged. Give them up to me"
"No" screams Dorothy. "I'll NEVER give up the RED SLIPPERS" (groan x 3?)
The witch flies off after giving Dorothy 24 hours to give up the Red Slippers, and then the Munchskins come out of hiding.
"Oh my" says Dorothy. "This Dross is a really strange place. I want to go home to Aunty Em".
The Mayor tells Dorothy that to get home she must see CON MAJOR, the Leader of the Cons - 'The Great and All Powerful Wishhard of Dross' - who lives in the Emerald Palace.
"Why do they call him the Wishard?" asks Dorothy.
The Mayor explains by singing:
"Con Major deals with State problems
In his own very special way
He will cross his fingers, close his eyes
And WISH HARD for them to go away."
To be continued. (Or maybe not
)