Part Six - Into the Mystical Realms
A number of things can seriously ruin a day
like a headache
A soar throat
The bus late for work
How about being accosted by someone when trying to sip a coffee
Or how about said person insisting they have a message, that someone is not who they say they are and dropping dead.
Even worse, when the police show up, you are arrested for murder, when you never touched the person.
Could it get any worse?
Wait, how about being handcuffed in the back of a police car as it drives itself through a dimension door...
Now that could ruin your day!!!
As I looked back at the two police officers, I noticed them change shape, into troll like creatures, who then vanished into thin air - They were doppelgängers, the original police officers must have been murdered by them. That was how they worked.
How were these creatures finding me, then I remembered, the dimension jump orb, in my pack pack, thoughtfully placed in the back of the police car with me.
As the car drove itself through the dimension door, the car filled with light and white noise. I remembered this from six years previous, when the trolls dragged me to the Mystical Realms to stand trial on charges of conspiracy to interfere in the affairs of mortals. Being a mortal I had to be let go, as charging a mortal with that crime was seen as a nonsense in law. Even the Mystical Realms and the Lord Low troll in those days had to play by the rules, or at least be seen to.
Now was a different matter.
There had been a coup by the orcs and the goblins, The Lord Low Troll had been assassinated and their version of ethnic cleansing was being carried out.
Why did they want me? I did not think I was of use to anyone?
Even the Spirit of Fancying did not really need me, as her set up of Brian and Amanda from Big Brother 8 was happening with out my interference. The latest news that they were taking things slow and not getting physical like Chiggy seemed to be doing, was already creating a awwe factor.
The noise stopped, and so did the police car.
Two Orcs ripped open the car door and dragged me out, along with my back pack.
One of the orcs wanted to steal my gear, but the other told him not to, as the advisor to the Arch Orc had wanted to see it.
As I looked around at the citadel where I had landed, it was just like six years previous, except this time the court yard was quiet, save for the drill practice of orcs and Goblins.
There were no dwarfs, halflings, fairies or elves.
The marks of battle were around, as some of the buildings had been destroyed by fire, most likely fire balls or lightning bolts.
This was odd as Orcs, Goblins and trolls did not use such magic, they could not. Only magician, ex-gods, and elves could weild magic. Oh yes, so could Griffins.
Dragons were too difficult to tame, plus they were difficult to house break, as they would break houses.
"MOVE HOOMAN" Shouted the chief orc, as he shoved me towards the steps of the justice building. Not my first time here, and still as unpleasant.
As I entered the lobby, I saw what I thought was an elf, but with a slightly dark complexion.
"I thought you were killing all the elves" I said
"SILENCE HOOMAN", yelled the Orc as he gave me a painful poke in the back
The elf looked at me, sneered and left the building.
As we marched down the hall to the holding cells, I could see Orc writing, on the doors, evidence of the coup. Some doors had been blasted open, and were blackened. What ever happened it was fast and must have had magical support.
Just before the cells, I looked out window and could see pikes with heads on. Hobbits, elves, Griffins, and in the centre, the head of the Lord Low Troll.
"IN" yelled the orc as he shoved me through the open cell door.
"Captain" came a voice from behind, it sounded like elvish, but different, "I think we do not need these"
The elf touched the handcuffs, and instantly they fell off. "Take this back pack and computer device to the advisor"
"WHAT ABOUT THE HOOMAN" Queried the orc in his loud voice
"He waits here for the moment" said the elf. I managed to get a look of him, like the other elf, he was of the same dark complexion.
The orc closed the cell door and locked it.
I looked around the cell, it was dark, damp and smelly, at least under the troll, things were clean, but without the dimension jump orb, I was stuck here.
I found a cell window to look into the next door cell, in there I could make out what looked like a hobgoblin, lying on the floor and chained to the wall by a chain and collar around his neck.
"Hello" I shouted
"I will not talk - so go away" the Hobgoblin replied in a rude manner
"I am not an orc, I am a mortal"
"A mortal?"
"Yes, a mortal"
The Hobgoblin, turned his head
"YOU!!!" he shouted
"Yes I am back" I replied, I recognised this Hobgoblin, six years ago he had the password to the Mystical Realms Treasury. He was a loyal lieutenant to the Lord Low Troll.
"So you have thrown your lot in with the Orcs, I won't talk" He sneered.
"Gruewold" I called, "I am not in the pay of the orcs. I am a prisoner as well" I added"
"So which spirit are you working for this time?" He asked "Oh sorry, I forgot, she topped herself"
I thought it best to keep quiet about the Spirit of Fancying and her mentor Yagel Pen Swift.
"Gruewold, who are these elves. I thought they were being wiped out"
Gruewold went back to staring at the cell door. "They aren't elves, they are Drow.
I was stunned to silence, Drow were dark elves. Elves with the same power, same magical ability, if not more powerful in that catagory, but purely evil. No wonder the Arch Orc had taken over. Maybe the advisor was a Drow, that would make sene, but why were they interfering with our world?.
It was well into the evening, before an orc came to the cell door, opened it.
I was ordered out, and escorted by two orcs and a drow to the central court room. The seating had all been removed and was now a sort of throne room. On it was seated the Arch Orc and a a hooded figure.
"So Human" The Arch Orc growled, "I come face to face with my vanquished's enemy"
"Why am I here" I asked.
"I thought your head would look good on a pike, after my advisor has finished with you. But maybe I will just eat you now, as I love the taste of humans"
At this the hooded advisor looked at the orc in shock. The hooded figure and the Arch Orc seemed to be in an argument about something.
Then the hooded figure spoke, in a shrill female voice "You are an oaf and a fool"
"How dare you speak to me, the Arch Orc like that" he yelled
"Arch Orc" she laughed "Orcs only go after strength, and you are weak"
"WHAT!!!"
At this the hooded figure pointed a hand at the Arch Orc. He clutched his throat, as if he was being strangled. Suddenly, he erupted into flames. Within seconds, he was ash. The hooded figure waved her arm and a wind blew the ash away. Then she sat down and removed her hood.
Her face was almost familiar
It reminded me of both the Spirit of True Love and the Spirit of Fancying.
"Middle Sister?" I asked
She lifted her head back
"Yes it is me, the true air to the affairs of human hearts"
Then she stood up, and just for effect, threw two lightning bolts, which incinerated two orc guards.
I looked on, frozen to the spot, "Who are you I whispered"
"I am the Spirit of Lust", before me all shall yield
"Now I have disposed of my brother and sister"
tune in next time for the next (yawn) exciting instalment