[Red Moon]

Is Brian the new Jade Goody of Big Brother?

We thought she was a one-off, that she was truly unique. But now Jade Goody — purveyor of ignorance, doyenne of dim — has a successor.

Last night Brian Bello, Big Brother 8 contestant and ardent Holy Valance fan, reached heights of ignorance once reserved for Goody alone.

It took some work. This is a woman who, during 2002’s Big Brother, described Saddam Hussein as a boxer, Sherlock Holmes as the inventor of the toilet and East Anglia as an exotic, foreign destination.

Dragged into the diary room for a quiz to decide the week’s food rationings, the stumped look on Bello’s face hinted that he had not only skipped too many English classes but had also been living under a rock.

"Which one of the following was not a play by Shakespeare - Romeo and Juliet, Taming of the Shrew, or Babe: Pig in the City?" Big Brother asked.

Bello’s response? "I don't know who this geezer is who's meant to have written or directed all these things."

And there was more. Big Brother, having clearly revelled in watching the 19-year-old’s shock when fellow housemate Nicky broke the news to him that women defecate, decided to test whether his newfound knowledge had stuck.

“"Do women poo?" Big Brother asked.

"It's not proper poo," Bello decided. "It's like rabbit poo.”

Combined with earlier revelations that when bored he talks to “imaginary hot girls” and dabbles in “cosmic ordering,” we can safely declare that Bello has matched, if not surpassed, the witterings of Goody.

Still, Bello is not alone. In a day of brilliant babbling, the blond, baby-faced Sam Marchant, 19, caught a glimpse of the kidneys and hearts Big Brother had delivered the housemates for cooking and screeched, "Why've you given us people's hearts and kidneys to eat, Big Brother?”

She must have wished she had never come out of the bathroom where she’d earlier enjoyed listening to an enlightening monologue delivered by 19-year-old Channelle Hayes.

"Wouldn't it be awful if dinosaurs started to live again?" she wondered.

"Would people keep them as pets do you think?"

Yes, Bello certainly has competition. But if there’s one thing for certain it is this: Jade Goody’s position as Big Brother’s most famous ignoramus is under threat.

Source: The Times

[Psylocke]

jade really is thick,brians is clearly an act.

[Dan_]

The difference is that Brian's actually a nice person, I'd say he was more like Helen.

[DiamondDogTags]

i laugh when brian does something funny.. whereas with jade i just shook my head.. just me then?