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Senior Member
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Rutland
Posts: 25,358
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Rutland
Posts: 25,358
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\'I\'m more famous than the Pope\'
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'I'm more famous than the Pope' The new self-proclaimed queen of the 'I'm a Celebrity' jungle is a bitchy ex-supermodel. So stand back ...it's war, says Ed Power
Janice Dickinson was unleashed on the Australian jungle this week and it looks like the jungle may have come off second best. Razor-tongued and with a gaze that could cause the faint of heart to shrivel up at 100 yards, Dickinson has stomped, Godzilla-style, all over the opening days of I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here. When a fellow contestant questioned her authority, Dickinson's snapped response was: "I'm more famous than the Pope." She is Xena:Warrior Princess crossed with Naomi Campbell in paparazzi-attacking mode.
Naturally, such antics make for television gold. In just a few days, Dickinson, a time-worn '70s supermodel (in the fashion industry she is referred to as the 100-year-old-model) has humiliated former England soccer star Rodney Marsh in something called the 'bush-tucker trial' -- both were strapped to a sinking car and required to fling plastic stars to shore -- and clashed with PR luvvie Lynne Franks.
In fact, Dickinson and Franks were at one another's throats (in the metaphorical sense, although you wouldn't be surprised to see them literally choking the life out of one another by series' end) before the contest had even properly begun. When former Sex Pistol manager Malcolm McLaren smashed all existing I'm A Celebrity... records by chickening out while still in his hotel, the two tussled over how best to persuade him to stay on board (in a subsequent press conference, McLaren offered the bombshell revelation that the jungle was infiltrated with cameramen -- really?!)
No sooner had they reached the encampment than they were rowing again. Franks, a tree-hugging control freak (and supposedly the inspiration for the hippy PR guru in Absolutely Fabulous) took it upon herself to play the role of mother, instructing everyone how best to cook their first jungle meal.
Most of the 'Snake Rock' team assented. Dickinson, of course, did not. "I don't mind you suggesting things Lynne," she said, "But can I have an opinion over here about what I stick in my gob." As Franks brushed over the interjection and continued with her lecture, you sensed gears and levers cranking beneath Dickinson's botox-shiny facade. It was as if a button had been pressed and she'd switched to superbitch setting.
It's when the adrenaline started to surge that Dickinson turned properly scary, though. Upon humiliating Marsh in the bush-whacker trial she embarked on a long and rather terrifying victory rant, comparing herself to James Bond. "I had to do this to save the world. I'm Janice Bond!" (Marsh's reaction was more pithy: "Anyone who spends that much on her body has to be some sort of bionic woman anyway.")
Ratcheting up the tension was the arrival, on day two, of former British Apprentice contestant Katie Hopkins. If Dickinson embodies the stereotype of the ballsy, big- mouthed American, then Hopkins is a classic example of the sneering English metropolitan. On The Apprentice, her air of condescending superiority and willingness to gratuitously stab other contestants in the back, quickly marked her out as the villain.
Parachuted into the jungle as McLaren's replacement, she made no secret of her determination to challenge Dickinson in the Queen Bitch stakes. "I'm the sort of person that will say what other people are too afraid to say," she told the camera. "I'll say it to their face. I'll say it out loud. So people either love me or they loathe me and I commend that. I'd rather be loved and loathed than be in this murky middle ground of mediocrity."
Still, perhaps Dickinson isn't quite the ice maiden she likes to portray herself as. Certainly, her marble exterior threatened to crumble as soon as she was asked to eat a crocodile penis. While foodie John Burton Race gamely tucked into the 'Sushi Train of Pain' spread of grubs and locusts, Dickinson appeared on the verge of throwing up.
After Race snaffled the croc's penis, Dickinson joked that he was gay. By way of comeback, he tried to kiss her. She looked like she was either going to vomit or punch him in the groin. Not surprisingly, in the face of Dickinson' gale-force personality the rest of the line-up (Hopkins and Franks excepted) have come off as profoundly anonymous.
Cerys Matthews, formerly the lead signer with Welsh band Catatonia seems far too nice and normal for reality television; soap actress Gemma Atkinson is, as you'd expect a Nuts magazine 'It' girl to be, unobjectionable but ditzy.
You can accuse Race of being undercooked when it comes to personality but he was at least prepared to enter into the I'm A Celebrity spirit by gobbling barbecued bugs.
However, it's the Dickinson-Frank face-off that has emerged as the defining narrative of I'm A Celebrity.... And it could yet go nuclear.
Ranting to other contestants, Dickson outlined plans to carve up and then devour her rival. "I'm going to stab her in the middle of the night and take her bed. I'll eat her t**s. I'll fry up those big old boobs." Cancel all your appointments. This is about to get interesting.
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Source: Irish Independent
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16-11-2007, 11:44 AM
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