[Magic]

I thought I would do little case studys, and put the debates in real life situations.

Case Study 1:

Your parents split up, and your Mum was unhappy for years. Finally she meets someone, and when she is with him she is so happy. However, her new partner acts violently towards you. What do you do? Tell, or leave her happy?

Case Study 2:

Since you were a child both of you parents have beaten you, although you love them. People often ask why are you bruised, but you dont want to say. What should you do? Report them?

[Nicky.]

Tell.

You can't keep something like that, just to make someone happy. However happy your mum is, you need her to know how he is treating you.

IMO anyway x

[Scarlett.]

I agree with Nicky, tell, befoe it goes to far

Your saftey is more important to your parents than their happiness

[Magic]

Thats what I think.
Your Mum is in false happyness.

[DamonJ]

I think you're Mom would be happier knowing you're safe than having a boyfriend.

[Xander]

Tell,
It might make her unhappy that she'd be taken away from her partner, but in the long term it will make her happy.

[SiaSiaSia]

Tell.. she deserves to know.
In situations like this though, sometimes the mum doesn't listen. [So i've read anyway]

[Conzors]

I wouldnt tell.

As long ass your own mum happy.

|For me theres nothing more plesant than seeing someone you love happy.

[SiaSiaSia]

Originally posted by Conzors
I wouldnt tell.

As long ass your own mum happy.

|For me theres nothing more plesant than seeing someone you love happy.

even if you're being abused?

[Billy]

Originally posted by Conzors
I wouldnt tell.

As long ass your own mum happy.

|For me theres nothing more plesant than seeing someone you love happy.

I'm sure you wouldnt.

Id do the same as most people.

[Tom]

Tell, my mum would do anything for us three. She finished a five year relationship because he didn't like me and my sister.

[Llamajohn]

tell

surely mummy would be happier if you were happy.

[Conzors]

Originally posted by Billy21

I'm sure you wouldnt.

Id do the same as most people.

uh?

I wouldnt tell my mum no.

For mess theres nothing more plesant than seeing someone you love happy.

So yea

[pinkmichk]

tell
yes there may be some short term upset but in the longterm its the right way to go as blood is thicker than water so something like this you wouldnt keep hidden

[hanny08]

Oh my god I'd tell and the reason is because I'd imagine putting myself in her shoes, and If I wasn't told but found out at a later date and this abuse had been ongoing...well I'd do time for someone who laid a finger on my kids!!!!

[bigbr0ther]

If he's beating you, he's probably beating your mom too! Willingness to hurt others is a personality trait.

Tell, tell, tell!

[Sticks]

OK

Suppose you tell, but your mum does not believe you and the Boyfriend says you are lying.

What then?

[Magic]

Case Study 2:

Since you were a child both of you parents have beaten you, although you love them. People often ask why are you bruised, but you dont want to say. What should you do? Report them?

BTW, this isn't me secretly seeking help for myself

[Scarlett.]

Hmm, that is a very hard one, maybe ask your parents or someone for your parents to recive help and concilling

[bigbr0ther]

Case 2: Report them.

I was always scared to but in hindsight I wish I had done this. I could have spared myself a lot of pain.

[Sticks]

Originally posted by Magic
Case Study 2:

Since you were a child both of you parents have beaten you, although you love them. People often ask why are you bruised, but you dont want to say. What should you do? Report them?

BTW, this isn't me secretly seeking help for myself

Most likely someone else might report it, and it will be taken out of the child's hands.

There have been cases though where parents were accused of abuse, only later for it to be found it was a medical condition.

[pinkmichk]

case 2 it should in theory not get to that point cos someone surely would have raised concerns with ss
if not then tell a 3rd party such as doctor teacher etc etc

[Scarlett.]

Sadly though, in some cases, it does

[Sticks]

How about a case study 3

No one is abusing you, however, you are on your bike or have borrowed a skateboard and have a crash, resulting in bruising and other injuries.

An over eager social worker spots you in A&E and gets it into their head, that is the result of abuse, and they will not believe your protestations that it was an accident, and you are placed in emergency care, pending reports, which could take weeks as far as you know.

Everyone is asking you to give examples of how you parents abused you, and there is some talk of using hypnosis as you are obviously in denial.

Now what do you do?

The other version of this scenario, is you are a junior social worker, and come across a child that was placed in emergency care because of a report from a social worker in A&E based on what they saw. The child insists they fell off of a bike and they sound credible. Do you report your suspicions the child may be telling the truth up the line or defer to the long stablished senior social worker who is known to go on crusades, but is highly regarded.

[Sunny_01]

Like many of you I like to THINK I would have told someone had this happened to me as a child, however I am not sure I wuold have had the confidence etc.. to tell someone nor felt able to trust any other adult enough to tell them something like this.

Most children are so scared of adults that they never feel able to tell anyone they are being abused. They fear the repercussions, they fear being taken away from everything they know and love and fear being judged as it being their fault.