[Z]

I'm just going to give you some recent examples...

A few weeks ago, I knew I had 3 big pieces of work to do for my subjects. Suddenly the number went up to 5. No sooner had I done two of the five pieces of work, did it go back up to 5. When I did one of them, it went up to 5 once more. It's now at 4, thankfully it won't go back up again; but I have four pieces of work/tests to do and I finish Uni next Friday. That's pretty unfair.

I've been depressed for months at Uni; not in an attention seeking way or a self harming way, but just bored and sad because I'm alone; my Dad visited me on the Thursday and it was the first time I'd genuinely felt happy in months... the other day he tells me that there's a distinct possibility he has MS (multiple sclerosis - essentially you become more and more disabled over time) and I'm not to tell my mum or my brothers because he doesn't want unnecessary drama at home in case it's not MS, but he needed to tell someone, so now I'm upset and I can't tell anyone why.

I went out tonight for the first time in a while, decided to just screw all this work and go and have a night of fun instead of spending yet another endless night in my room on here and on Facebook; went out and had a whale of a time, came back to the flat to discover my best friend (he lives in my flat.. we requested it) throwing up and desperately needing to go to hospital (he's been ill for a year and a half with a mystery illness that no doctor has diagnosed) so I only got back from hospital at 5 in the morning... I have a 9am lecture to attend tomorrow morning, they're compulsory and they take attendance at them.

It feels like every time something positive happens in my life, there's just something terrible waiting round the corner for me. Those are just really recent examples, I'm not exaggerating, I just don't think I'm allowed to be happy anymore... I dyed my hair and I really, really liked it, that cheered me up so much and made me forget about my dad maybe having MS for a while; I went on webcam to show my mum and all she could do was insult me and make me feel bad about myself. I don't know what to do anymore, I don't really know what is expected of me by other people or how I'm supposed to stop attracting bad luck, it feels like I spend all my time trying to make other people happy and I get nothing in return... I emailed the lecturer who takes tomorrow's class to let her know I had to go to hospital and won't be in tomorrow, I don't care if she doesn't accept it as an excuse, I have things other than ****ty 9am lectures on German grammar to focus on.

Anyway, I'm off to hug my pillow and tell myself things will be better some day. Night/morning fellow TiBBers, I hope life's treating you better than it's treating me...

[Raph]

aww Zee! I wish I could give you a big hug after reading that <3
someday things will work out - they always do

[sooty]

Originally Posted by sweety_samy

aww Zee! I wish I could give you a big hug after reading that <3
someday things will work out - they always do

This.



Negative thought would attract negative things.
Be positive, Zee. (It is easy for me to say, though,,,,,,.at the moment)

Big hug.

[Enid]

Blip on the radar, Zee. Remember that. Uni isn't suppose to be fun. It's a time where you're supposed to knuckle down and focus on your studies. Imagine how happy you will be when you graduate?

[Crimson Dynamo]

Life is tough, its a struggle - be under no illusions. You are reaching an age when things become real. You have to enjoy the good times and steel yourself for the bad. bad times make you a better person.

if you had a faith I would say pray to Jesus and tell him how you feel and ask for help. if you could go and see a local Minister he or she would give great counsel. It may not be for you but perhaps you could give it a thought.

Do what Churchill advised his staff to do when facing the blackest days of WWII

"Keep buggering on"

"In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer."
-- Albert Camus

"It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness."
-- Eleanor Roosevelt

[Tom4784]

I do hope your friend gets better and I hope that your dad hasn't got MS.

Is there any closer Unis to home you can transfer to if you feel alone at the current one? That way you can keep in touch with friends and family more.

Remember you can always talk to us on Msn when you feel the need to unload

[NettoSuperstar!]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

Life is tough, its a struggle - be under no illusions. You are reaching an age when things become real. You have to enjoy the good times and steel yourself for the bad. bad times make you a better person.

if you had a faith I would say pray to Jesus and tell him how you feel and ask for help. if you could go and see a local Minister he or she would give great counsel. It may not be for you but perhaps you could give it a thought.

Do what Churchill advised his staff to do when facing the blackest days of WWII

"Keep buggering on"

"In the midst of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer."
-- Albert Camus

"It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness."
-- Eleanor Roosevelt

In complete agreement for once...make the most of the good times Zee, **** twats off and love the good souls

[Z]

Thank you for the kind words everyone, I like the quotes you gave there LT, I'm going to keep those in mind every time something bad happens . I'm not a Christian, but I will take that into consideration, I appreciate religion for the way it can help people through the toughest of times. I could move to Aberdeen Uni, Dean (being from Aberdeen) although I really don't want to resort to that; I'd have to start all over again in terms of making friends at Uni and I'd be living at home, although that wouldn't necessarily be a bad thing. I'm going to visit my friend in hospital in a couple of hours, hopefully cheer him (and myself) up!

[Smithy]

You'll be a better person at the end of it all though

[InOne]

Don't let the bastards grind you down.

[Beastie]

Originally Posted by InOne

Don't let the bastards grind you down.

This.

Omg I always used to say this quote

[InOne]

Yup, great saying eh lol

[Beastie]

Originally Posted by InOne

Yup, great saying eh lol

It certainly is Joejoe!

[Tom]

It takes 5 positives to counteract a single negative, so the chances are good things are happening, you just don't realise it!

[Jords]

Aw Greg you seem a great lad from the chats Ive had with you, deserve much more happiness than your actually getting at the moment. Sorry to hear about your dad, hopefully its not as serious as that, and mums always moan at what they think is 'silly', dont take that to heart - your hair is funky! I feel Im in a similar situation at times, but you just gotta rise from it and get in a more positive frame of mind. And like Enid said, Uni is to further your studies and you should be working hard, everybody who is out partying every night will not do aswell as you in the future!

[pinkmichk]

they do say what doesnt kill us can only make us stronger it may seem crap now but once your at the oher side of this particular time in your life you'll be a changed person for it

[MrGaryy]

well on the MS sitch, I had this really nice teacher in secondary school who had MS for about 20 years and he was still really capable of getting around fine and is still teaching today as far as I know and he's like, really old LOL. So don't think of it as a death sentence

the friends thing sucks but on the plus side, you just said you went out and had a whale of a time so maybe it's not as bad as you're building it up in your head to be? I know I have a habit of doing that LOL.

The school thing is just such a bummer.