[Z]

Picture the scene, I am sitting at my laptop, sitting on this fine website and not sleeping, when my mother comes storming in:

Ma: I don't care if you don't feel like going to sleep until 2 in the morning, but you're affecting my sleep. I have to get up in three hours time, and you're banging about, lights on, music blaring, door wide open.

Me: Mum, it's midnight, you get up at 5am, that would be 5, yes, 5 hours from now. I've been sat here for the past two hours solid, I don't think I've moved at all actually, because I've been watching Skins and then on the laptop. My music is not blaring, I have headphones in, the door's open because the cat's sleeping on my bed and I have the light on because I'm scared of the monsters - like you!

Ma: Go to bed.



Exeunt mother.






Chriiiist.