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20-10-2013, 11:46 PM | #1 | |||
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Z
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Just been chatting away to a friend on my course at uni about a girl on our course who flipped out and decided not to speak to any of us about a year and a half ago, and she's never made up with us... anyone want to share any stories about dramatic fall outs with friends?
I'll start with the one I mentioned above... My uni course is now only 20 people and my group of friends on it at the time consisted of 9 people, almost half of the class. We moved to Germany in September 2011 and 3 of us were in close proximity to one another - two girls (R and C) and myself. Over the previous 2 years at uni, 8/9 of us had gotten to know each other through sharing personal stories and generally just having fun together. C had never really engaged with the group as a whole, choosing to remain in the background and not speaking much during social occasions, which had never been a problem because some people are like that in group situations (sometimes I am, sometimes I'm not) but when we moved to Germany and it was down to 3 of us, it all changed. R and I would hang out just the two of us quite a lot because we were both homesick and would say as much, choosing to spend our time talking about home and going sightseeing to while the days away. C never once told us how she was feeling, she never invited us anywhere nor did she ever ask to be included. We didn't feel any sense of obligation towards her because she'd never really tried to get to know us before. Suddenly what was fairly innocuous, her being quiet in large groups, became irritating, because if you hung out with her, she would be borderline mute and you were acutely aware of the fact that the third person wasn't saying anything. We didn't invite her places because we didn't think she wanted to be invited anywhere, she didn't seem to show much of an interest in us at all. We thought maybe she was homesick, but when we asked her, she denied it and would go back to saying nothing. Fast forward 5 months and it was R's birthday. R had friends coming over to visit especially; and she invited me because we're good friends. She felt conflicted about inviting C because she didn't want to lump me with her - nobody else from uni was invited because they all lived really far away, it was just R's friends from home and R's friends she had made in Germany. So she didn't invite her. Days later, C blocked us from Facebook and sent us an email telling us that we were "users" and "horrible people" because we didn't invite her anywhere. I replied to her, but she never sent one back. She later deleted most of the rest of the group from Facebook. We've been back at uni since September 2012 and I apologised to her, that I didn't realise she was feeling left out because she'd never indicated that she felt that way and I felt horrible for causing that situation without realising it, but she never forgave me and she continues to mostly ignore all of us at uni which is a shame because it's such a small course and I don't believe myself to be a bad person. I apologised, even though I didn't have to, perhaps she didn't accept it because she knows that I don't really think I have anything to be sorry for. I did it out of courtesy because we had another 2 years of studying left together. My apology was genuine, I do feel bad for making her feel left out; but if only she had said something at the time instead of going from silence to pure rage, things could have been so different... |
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20-10-2013, 11:52 PM | #2 | |||
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Lee.
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My friend tried to drug me with a sedative on more than one occasion before I clicked on to what she was doing.. For reasons I don't really know, but I suspect she wanted to touch me. We've never spoken again.
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20-10-2013, 11:54 PM | #3 | |||
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Z
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20-10-2013, 11:55 PM | #4 | |||
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Lee.
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It really was!
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20-10-2013, 11:57 PM | #5 | |||
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Z
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I think I'm quite a tolerant person until people try to project their personal problems onto me, then I'm really fiery and don't take any ****. I'm friends with a lot of people who have some serious personal issues and I'm good at helping people out with that kind of thing, but if someone projects their problem onto me and tries to blame me for something that's quite clearly their problem, I don't hesitate to terminate the friendship. Something like that though, that's really mental... trying to drug you! Crazy...
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21-10-2013, 12:04 AM | #6 | |||
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Lee.
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Greg, it was so mental and unbelievable, I actually started to doubt my own sanity!
The last time she did it, I could feel myself falling asleep again and it had dawned on me what was happening.. I asked her to phone me a taxi which she did.. As I was getting drowsier, I realised the taxi wasn't coming and asked her to phone again. As she was speaking, I could hear the dialling tone on the phone.. She hadn't even phoned a taxi! I had told my then bf my suspicions, phoned him to come and get me and he phoned her when we got home and told her to stay the **** away from me.. That was the last time I saw her. I'm talking about my best friend btw!!
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21-10-2013, 12:04 AM | #7 | |||
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Likes cars that go boom
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Lee that's a bit cray, did you call the police?
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21-10-2013, 12:05 AM | #8 | |||
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ZakJam <3~
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I made a really close friendship in my first year of university. I ended up sleeping with her but then I got back with my ex-girlfriend and I was unaware that this girl still had feelings for me cos I'm a massive dick tbfh.
Long story short she dropped out of uni, converted to Islam and I haven't spoken to her for a few years. I miss her a lot tbh. Last edited by LemonJam; 21-10-2013 at 12:12 AM. |
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21-10-2013, 12:08 AM | #9 | |||
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Likes cars that go boom
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I thought that read I have a massive dick...
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21-10-2013, 12:08 AM | #10 | |||
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Z
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I had a friend in 5th year at school who started going out with this girl in the year below and he asked me what I thought and I said "I think she'll dump you because she thinks she's too good for you" and he got really offended (fair enough) and fell out with me, and then that's exactly what happened, she dumped him like a week later because he wasn't cool enough for her, so he resolved to never speak to me OR the rest of our group again, got with my ex-girlfriend to try and piss me off (I didn't care) and then totally changed his personality, style and appearance to fit in with a new group and we've never spoken to each other ever since. I find it quite funny now looking back, I was just being honest like any good friend should, but it wasn't the answer he wanted to hear... and he decided to never speak to me again because I was right.
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21-10-2013, 12:08 AM | #11 | |||
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Lee.
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No.. I thought about it, but thought they'd maybe think I was crazy! The last time I left her house, I considered taking my drink with me as I could actually see a layer of powder in the bottom of the glass (I reckon it was Nytol) but even if I'd taken that to the police, it wouldn't have proved anything .
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21-10-2013, 12:09 AM | #12 | |||
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ZakJam <3~
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21-10-2013, 12:10 AM | #13 | |||
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Lee.
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21-10-2013, 12:13 AM | #14 | |||
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♡☯♡☮♡☯♡☮♡
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Me and my group of friends unanimously decided to oust one of the group due to her (16 at the time) having an affair with a 38 year old married man and putting them before us all. She now is caught up in a court case after the pair were caught wiring their neighbours electricity meter to their house.
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21-10-2013, 12:14 AM | #15 | |||
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Likes cars that go boom
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I once wiped a whole table of drinks on the floor as I thought my bf had kissed my friend (he hadn't)
Then I got spiked in blackpool and she blamed me for ruining her evening as she had to rescue me from this bloke, luckily when she put me to bed there were some stags in our guesthouse who invited her in so I was forgiven
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21-10-2013, 12:17 AM | #16 | |||
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Z
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I have another really good one...
I had a friend from school who was at the same uni as me (he graduated last year) and we maintained a friendship of sorts, maybe saw each other once a month, we weren't especially close and I think perhaps he considered me to be one of his best friends because he'd moved to my school after being bullied at his previous one and he never kept friends for particularly long because he was quite a volatile person... (hint: foreshadowing!!) whereas I've had most of my friends for years and years, when I befriend someone I consider them a friend for life until proven otherwise. I'd always held this boy at an arm's length because he was so volatile but he'd never taken anything out on me before so I maintained our friendship. That all changed when he was drunk one night and I showed up at a party he was at and he started a rumour about me while I was sober and in the same room. I was literally looking at him and listening to him when he said to other people that I had gone home with someone the night before when I categorically hadn't. Rather than cause a scene, I just decided to slip away from the party and go home and decided not to bother being friends with him anymore. A few weeks later (as was normal, as I said, we didn't speak much anyway) he tried chatting to me and I didn't reply. He then started to message me regularly trying to meet up and then eventually started asking me if I was ignoring him. Eventually I replied saying that I wasn't speaking to him and didn't consider him to be a friend after he started a rumour about me. He denied doing it, so I told him that it was when I was in the room and was actively listening to him when he said it. He denied doing it and then said "it's not my fault if you're annoyed with me" so I said "I hope you have a nice life, I'm not your friend anymore." I removed him off Facebook and that was that... or so I thought. Over a year later, I was at home for summer working in a full time office job and was woken up in the middle of the night by a friend calling me asking if I knew my ex-friend's home phone number. I said no, why? Apparently he was calling people up telling them that he was going to commit suicide, so they were looking for his home phone number to tell his parents. I snorted and said "he's bull****ting, don't believe him" and got a barrage of abuse from a few mutual friends until it turned out two days later that he had in fact been at home with his mum and wasn't remotely suicidal, he was just attention seeking. I told all of our mutual friends to never ever contact me again in relation to him and nobody ever has. Psycho! |
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21-10-2013, 12:21 AM | #17 | |||
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ZakJam <3~
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-wonders when Greg will fall out with me-
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21-10-2013, 12:23 AM | #18 | |||
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Lee.
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None of your FRANDS will ever fall out with you James
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21-10-2013, 12:25 AM | #19 | |||
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Z
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21-10-2013, 12:38 AM | #20 | |||
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ZakJam <3~
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21-10-2013, 01:30 AM | #21 | |||
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Senior Member
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was she cute?
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Don't be afraid to be weak. |
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21-10-2013, 01:38 AM | #22 | |||
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Ż\_(ツ)_/Ż
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never try lemon jam folks
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21-10-2013, 03:28 AM | #23 | |||
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Quand il pleut, il pleut
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..boringly, I don't think I've ever had a fall out with a real life friend...when I was very young I had a best friend who cheated with my then boyfriend but I wasn't really bothered and we didn't fall out... they ended up getting married/divorced through him cheating on her so all ended up being, I guess..predictable...
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21-10-2013, 04:00 AM | #24 | ||
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Senior Member
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Quote:
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21-10-2013, 04:13 AM | #25 | |||
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Senior Member
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i've never fallen out with any of my own friends, but i have had some "friends" brought into our group by mutual friends, that i knew were no good, and i was proven right.
it's difficult when one of your true friends tries to bring in a new friend and you know they are no good, but you can't say anything, because you will just be seen as being "jealous", so it's better to just bite your tongue and let it play out. I've seen it happen many times.
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Don't be afraid to be weak. Last edited by lostalex; 21-10-2013 at 04:15 AM. |
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