[user104658]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

On that note I have to say I find the 'lazy mums bottlefeed' argument to be absolutely ridiculous. Its much harder to bottlefeed..getting up at 4am to faff on making a bottle rather than just whipping your tits out and lying in bed with your baby

I don't think this is driven home hard enough in maternity units; it's short term pain vs long term gain! Establishing breastfeeding is a lot of hard work, but once it's done it's done, and of course it's much easier with any future children... and like you said, further down the line it's clearly a much easier option! We've never had to consider bottles for night-time feeds, bottles for travelling or going out, what to do if they're suddenly hungry and there's nowhere to prepare a bottle... it sounds like a pain in the arse to me! Especially as I've never had to actually breastfeed either, haha... but yeah I have to admit, it sounds like a lot of extra effort and planning to me.

If we're being honest though, I do think a lot of new mothers are in part tempted towards formula so that night feeds can be shared between mum and dad or occasionally delegated to a grandparent. Not that this applies to all - I'm very aware that there are lots of mothers who would have happily taken on the responsibility but weren't able to (usually because they were failed by the support system, as I said above).

There are also dads who push for it because they don't want to "miss the bonding experience" of night feeds. Which is... let's be honest... purely selfish. We did have a girl fairly recently whose partner wanted to share in night feeds as he felt he was missing out, so she was asking if it's possible to pump breastmilk to be used for night feeds. Again somewhere that standard advicve is woeful; an NHS health visitor told her that it was a great idea. When in reality, the biological mechanisms for successful breastfeeding rely on night time natural feeding patterns in order to maintain an adequate milk supply for the next day... and most women who pump through the day for bottle use at night find their supply dropping or drying up completely within a matter of a month or two. Sigh. Luckily in this case she was able to convince the dad that there were plenty of other ways he could bond with the baby and it didn't need to involve feeding. Personally, I find the idea that a dad has to feed his baby in order to "bond properly" absolutely ridiculous