[Lewis.]

-Claps fakely knowing I was a million times better at judges house anyway-

[Z]

Next up it's Eoin Cowell and his category! Eoin?

Up first for me tonight is Treyc Cohen.

Youtube video

[Lewis.]

-Performs loudly-

[Z]

Treyceeeeeee. You were fabulous tonoight, I absolutely laaved it, you can seeng ehnything! Moi only criticism would be that you have a ghetto booty.

awkward silence in the crowd; Joey Walsh, Shuryl Cole and Eoin Cowell look at her in horror

Yah?

[Shaun]

Tray see goal I luvved it, pure an simpelz leik

[Z]

And now we go to Joey Walsh! Who's up next, Joey?

It's the FABULOUS Tom Richards. He's not Irish but THE WHOLE OF IRELAND SHOULD GET BEHIND TAM!!!

Youtube video

[MeMyselfAndI]

(from joey

[Lewis.]

Originally Posted by Zee

Treyceeeeeee. You were fabulous tonoight, I absolutely laaved it, you can seeng ehnything! Moi only criticism would be that you have a ghetto booty.

awkward silence in the crowd; Joey Walsh, Shuryl Cole and Eoin Cowell look at her in horror

Yah?

-Cries backstage and phones up Faily Star to book interview-

[Z]

Tom, I wouldn't have picked you if it were up to me. OWAIT I DIDN'T LOL. But yah, you did an alright job with that song, it suited you well xxXx

[Shaun]

Ah'll be honest wit yuhz Tom ah've got noor idee who yuhz are leik. But tha wor a lovalee song choys, yuh reminded us of a wee Barree Manilor!

[MeMyselfAndI]

thankyou judges

[Z]

We're going back to Shuryl Cole! Who's up next Shuryl?

[Shaun]

Up next fer yuhz ah'v got 5 lovalee young wimin doin' it fer alla tuh goals out thur! It's Hussel singin' a gorjus li'ul song originalee by me fayvrit oartist leik, Bob Dillin. E's wicked good leik!

Youtube video

[Jords]

*blondie sings and the rest look irrelevant grasping at their hearts behind*

[Shaun]

Goals tha woaz finomminel! Yer'z deffinittlee froo t' next week!

[Z]

Hussssssssssiesss! Guhlz, you cahn't just rely on one lead singah to carry the whole band, unless you're Shuryl in which case you do that until you have a single that doesn't chart in the top 10 and then you ditch the band and use will.i.am, Eoin Cowell and a footballer to get where you are today. Um. I don't really know where I'm going with this. You're guhlz, in a band, so you're probably sluts.

[Z]

After the break, we have performances from Belle Amie, Wagner, Aiden and Matt. Don't go anywhere! Like honestly, just sit there and wait.

[Lewis.]

Originally Posted by Zee

just sit there and wait.

On meeehz getto boohty.

[Maia]

-claps-

I am cannot wait for my performance.

[Z]

Welcome back! Have you gone on a murderous rampage because of that annoying advert before the show starts again? The one where they sing Bonnie Tyler 'n' stuff? If not, better luck next time! Anyway, we're back, and onto Joey and his next act!

Thanks Grermot. Up next it's Belle Amie! Conveniently right after Husstle!

Youtube video

[Lewis.]

-hmmmm-

Bored now...

-turns over to strictly cummin when dancin-

[Z]

Guuuuhlz! It's a shame you're a guhl band, this was an okay performance but it's pretty much a condition of my contract to be mean to guhls. Plug your vaginas.

[Shaun]

Ah'm sorree goals but yuhz cant joss goor and slap mei goals leik the failee stoar sez yuhz did. An I doorn't even noor what song yuhz jus sang leik.

[Z]

Back to Dannzee Minogue and her category. Who's up next Dannzee?

It's the one you've all been waiting for; it's Wagner! PRONOUNCED WITH A V. k.

Youtube video

[Maia]

Yeeusss!!

-performs-