[Romantic Old Bird]

'No, indeed madam, it is I who should apologise', said Superstench as he oozed noxiously in her general direction, 'It is unforgiveably rude I know, arriving completely unannounced, and I regret the necessity to do this, but you are single-handedly wrecking my plans to exude my horrendous pong throughout the known universe, and I must render you senseless immediately!'

[BusyBee]

Oh no, you have met your match there is no smell or stench that can beat me I have a spray to eliminate anything, but I have a proposition for you, I'm always looking for new opportunities so perhaps we can work together, you go to visit homes and work your worst - just make sure you drop one of my business cards and I can follow behind doing the cleaning and we can share the profits making a perfect partnership.

[Romantic Old Bird]

Superstench smiled and snorted, emitting enough of his foul breath to flatten a row of winter pansies and a small everdreen tree, "This is a wonderfully EVIL plan, I like it - something will be rotten not only in the state of Denmark, we'll go GLOBAL - but I warn you, I am becoming stronger all the time, one day you will not be able to totally eradicate my work - until then, we will forge an unholy alliance'.

[kaphc]

Supermom laughed! "OK, let's go and find our first victim .... er... customer" she suggested. They headed off in the direction of Windsor.

[Romantic Old Bird]

'My dear, you have quite surpassed yourself' said Superstench to SuperMom: these drains are positively MEDIEVAL, I can lay flat an small community with a nice outbreak of gastroenterits, too, too easy, how absolutely DIVINE, who are the lucky family who live here by the way?'

[BusyBee]

Not quite sure, but there are certainly a lot of glitzy and sparkly things around that I can get my polishing cloth on after you have left that smelly, green slime covering everything - wow what a sum we are going to make here.

[Romantic Old Bird]

'Glitzy and Sparkly, hmm, perhaps if they weren't covered in verdigris already - it's already filthy here, no challenge at all really - who are these admirbly grubby sorts?'

[BusyBee]

Well I did hear something about not washing your dirty linen in public - but they've got lots of houses so you spread the gunge and Supermom will make herself indispensible and we'll soon make sure all their money is redistributed - who wants to be a millionaire we do - gunge as much as you want oh slimey one.

[Romantic Old Bird]

Money - I like money I do - it's filthy, and it's makes people go mad, and when they go mad they let things slide, but, who are all these little people in uniform and aprons, running aroud CLEANING?

[Skip]

Are they friends of yours SUPERMOM ?

[BusyBee]

I did hear the chief one had appeared on a TV programe called Big Brother whatever that is and spent her whole time cleaning and sweeping and because she didnt get any tv work she tries to do us out of a job, but the dynamic duo will remove her and send to Orkney to do some visiting.

[Sticks]

At this point the Haddock came in and said "does anyone mind if I have a half day today, I wanted to meet the Sea Bass in town for a game of five card stud"

[Skip]

Supermom and Stench looked at each other puzzled, then Stench finally replied, "Haddock, we need you to take this little cleaning freak to Orkney first, then you can go play with your studs."

[Boris]

However 'playing with studs' was more in the line of JOAN COLLINS than Haddock so he let that one past and went off to watch the rugby.Now those lads not only looked like studs but also had a good selection of them on their boots.

He called to supermom to see what she had to say about Haddock's new activity.

[BusyBee]

Supermom stared at Stench who was jumping up and down and shouting in excitement - those kits, those kits, those beautiful muddy kits oh how clever my brother Ausi Stench is he deserves a medal.

[Romantic Old Bird]

Supermom then espied the glistening muscled bods of the tired but victorious English Rugger Team as they climbed into the communal bath, and shouted to Stench as she threw her own clothes onto the pile, running naked towards the bath, " You are on your own Stench, MOVE OVER BOYS, I'M COMING IN - GERONIMO!"

[BusyBee]

The team could not believe what was happening, there was Supermom with her flannel and rugby ball shaped sponge filling the huge bath with bubble bath and what was going on under the covering of bubbles had to be seen to be believed.

[Sticks]

Then the Sea Bass spoke up and said, "The haddock had to go home as he was not feeling well, so I said I would fill in"

[Romantic Old Bird]

'Thank goodness for that", said Jonno, "I wondered what the smell was, thought it was one of the full backs - we can't have that, there's a lady present - excuse me Mrs......can I have my loofah back please?"

[BusyBee]

The name's Super, Supermom but you can call me Super and it will give me the greatest pleasure to ensure that everyone of you lads is scrubbed scrupiously clean by the use of this loofah and you Jonny are first on the list - personal service is my speciality.

[Romantic Old Bird]

"I had heard about your 'personal services' before, Supermom, in fact my Father says you were well known in the shipyards back in the 70's as well - you certainly must be a remarkable woman - such drive - such enthusiasm - such determination.......NO, PLEASE - THERE ARE SOME THINGS A MAN MUST LOOFAH ON HIS OWN!!!!!"

[BusyBee]

Such aspirations - I'll have you know Mr Kick With Both Feet Wilkinson I can offer a long list of recommendations with regard to my 'personal services' and I give seminars on them, please be aware that following my success with certain members of BB2 I was asked to supply one of my assistants to last year's show and I understand she did very well so just grin and bear it young man you KNOW you will like it.

[Romantic Old Bird]

"W--ee----ll, OK, but just be careful where you are putting that sponge, and for God's sake put your clothes back on - grown men are in tears - remember we are all pretty weak from our exhausting exertions in the Antipodes"