[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Ninastar

^ because not everyone he serves is 9 months pregnant

As said he could have countless times served pregnant women without even realising.
If he really was so against the concept of being the one to serve alcohol why put yourself in that position?

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

As said he could have countless times served pregnant women without even realising.
If he really was so against the concept of being the one to serve alcohol why put yourself in that position?

he could also serve someone that then goes and drives home knocking down a pregnant woman!
what a hypocrite!

[Ninastar]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

As said he could have countless times served pregnant women without even realising.
If he really was so against the concept of being the one to serve alcohol why put yourself in that position?

because this time it was totally obvious that she was pregnant.

[Cherie]

I wonder how many of the men outraged at this woman having a small glass of wine with her meal, have given up for 9 months in solidarity with their partner or even in the months before conception (if they were trying to have a child), took supplements, excercised and basically led an exemplery lifestyle so that their sperm is in tip top condition.

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I wonder how many of the men outraged at this woman having a small glass of wine with her meal, have given up for 9 months in solidarity with their partner or even in the months before conception (if they were trying to have a child) so that their sperm is in tip top condition.

im tee total and always have been, so my sperm are usain bolts of the sperm world,lol

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I wonder how many of the men outraged at this woman having a small glass of wine with her meal, have given up for 9 months in solidarity with their partner or even in the months before conception (if they were trying to have a child), took supplements, excercised and basically led an exemplery lifestyle so that their sperm is in tip top condition.

But why does it have to be such a problem that the partner would have to stop drinking it too?

If you struggle to go without alcohol for a few months then there are a few problems that need addressing.

[thesheriff443]

in this case the bar man was discriminating against her because she was pregnant which is wrong.
for all the women that are agreeing with the bar man, put your self in her position! it would not have been an issue if the husband would of ordered the drink.
we should disregard pregnant women?

[MeMyselfAndI]

I personally think anyone who drinks when heavily pregnant is very selfish, and this woman is not only that but she just wants her story spread round everywhere, such an attention seeker

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by MeMyselfAndI

I personally think anyone who drinks when heavily pregnant is very selfish, and this woman is not only that but she just wants her story spread round everywhere, such an attention
seeker

It is more important to avoid alcohol in the first trimester due to the foetus being in the developmental stage.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Cherie

It is more important to avoid alcohol in the first trimester due to the foetus being in the developmental stage.

While I don't doubt that this is true - the whole concept of a foetus, and latterly a baby, is that it is permanently in a developmental stage until, you know, you reach adulthood... and this woman's even admitted that she's had alcohol in the first 12 weeks of her pregnancy, knowingly...

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Zee

While I don't doubt that this is true - the whole concept of a foetus, and latterly a baby, is that it is permanently in a developmental stage until, you know, you reach adulthood... and this woman's even admitted that she's had alcohol in the first 12 weeks of her pregnancy, knowingly...

The end of the first trimester appears to be the period when alcohol can wreak the most havoc on fetal development, causing physical deformities as well as behavioral and cognitive symptoms, according to research in the journal Alcoholism: Clinical & Experimental Research.

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2012/01/1...#ixzz2gI7kDlDY

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by Cherie

It is more important to avoid alcohol in the first trimester due to the foetus being in the developmental stage.

Yup, this too.

[Ammi]

..I don’t believe she was selfish in that if we’re to believe what she says and there is no reason not to, then she was very responsible in her alcohol intake and genuinely believed that it wasn’t harmful to her unborn child..she also had the choice to give up completely which she didn’t take but instead chose to have a moderate amount a few times a week..these were all her own choices to make and completely within her control and possibly quite safe...but every choice isn’t hers to make and it was never her choice whether someone would serve her that alcohol...in this case it was the choice of that barman and he made his choice which he was completely in his rights to do....maybe she didn’t like that other people in life also have choices and sometimes they may conflict with what she wants and her own decisions but none of us have control over everything that happens in life...so in forum words..seriously, get over it...save your energy for those sleepless nights and the exhaustion that can be new parenthood...

[Vicky.]

My midwife told me that a few glasses of wine (a week) was perfectly fine.

And that its actually recommended that some women have a drink of guiness every week or so to help with iron levels.

This barperson sounds a twat.

Though if she was caning the drink, I would have refused too..but one drink takes the piss

[Shaun]

I'm so bored of this overprotective BS. If it ends up damaging the child then it's her problem, nobody else's. All of this "I should stop her from buying something potentially harmful to the child" nonsense... so does that mean she shouldn't be able to buy kitchen knives? Paracetamol? Cars? I mean cars might lead to the death of both mother and foetus, so they're more dangerous, right?

It's so much weight put on what "might" be harmful to the child (and since that medical advice varies from midwife to midwife, and doctors, as Vicky pointed out) when really, what this boils down to is a man failing to do his job.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Shaun

I'm so bored of this overprotective BS. If it ends up damaging the child then it's her problem, nobody else's. All of this "I should stop her from buying something potentially harmful to the child" nonsense... so does that mean she shouldn't be able to buy kitchen knives? Paracetamol? Cars? I mean cars might lead to the death of both mother and foetus, so they're more dangerous, right?

It's so much weight put on what "might" be harmful to the child (and since that medical advice varies from midwife to midwife, and doctors, as Vicky pointed out) when really, what this boils down to is a man failing to do his job.

Kitchen knives are for chopping. Paracetamol is for pain. Cars are for transport. Alcohol is for getting drunk. There is a marked difference between an item that could secondarily cause adverse effects and something that has a primary objective of messing up the human body. A bar is inclined to not serve you if it thinks serving you will cause it problems - whether that be a too-drunk-18-year-old or a heavily-pregnant-mother-to-be. Foetal alcohol syndrome is an actual thing. It's common knowledge that getting drunk while you're pregnant is frowned upon. The barman made his choice and most people think he was right to do so - he didn't serve her because he thought it would be wrong to do so. He didn't not serve her just to embarrass her. He didn't fail to do his job, rather he did his job properly - he didn't give alcohol to someone he felt shouldn't be drinking alcohol.

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Zee

Kitchen knives are for chopping. Paracetamol is for pain. Cars are for transport. Alcohol is for getting drunk. There is a marked difference between an item that could secondarily cause adverse effects and something that has a primary objective of messing up the human body. A bar is inclined to not serve you if it thinks serving you will cause it problems - whether that be a too-drunk-18-year-old or a heavily-pregnant-mother-to-be. Foetal alcohol syndrome is an actual thing. It's common knowledge that getting drunk while you're pregnant is frowned upon. The barman made his choice and most people think he was right to do so - he didn't serve her because he thought it would be wrong to do so. He didn't not serve her just to embarrass her. He didn't fail to do his job, rather he did his job properly - he didn't give alcohol to someone he felt shouldn't be drinking alcohol.

And there in lies the problem, there are people who can and do have just one or two drinks to relax but without the aim of getting drunk, Im not sure this womans aim was to get drunk either as otherwise she would have ordered a bottle!

[Shaun]

Originally Posted by Zee

alcohol is for getting drunk.

When you're 15, maybe. I doubt her intention was to get blottoed. Some people drink wine with any meal.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Shaun

When you're 15, maybe. I doubt her intention was to get blottoed. Some people drink wine with any meal.

I didn't say "getting wasted and getting an ambulance home", I said getting drunk. You cannot possibly refute that fact that alcohol gets you drunk, and wine is a kind of alcohol. These are facts?!?!

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by Shaun

I'm so bored of this overprotective BS. If it ends up damaging the child then it's her problem, nobody else's. All of this "I should stop her from buying something potentially harmful to the child" nonsense... so does that mean she shouldn't be able to buy kitchen knives? Paracetamol? Cars? I mean cars might lead to the death of both mother and foetus, so they're more dangerous, right?

It's so much weight put on what "might" be harmful to the child (and since that medical advice varies from midwife to midwife, and doctors, as Vicky pointed out) when really, what this boils down to is a man failing to do his job.

I swear to god if you listen to all of the guidelines and such when pregnant, you would live on nothing but raw veg. But no carrots as they are bad for you now apparently

I tried to do everything right to begin with. In the end, I ate as I normally do, cut back on drinking and smoking, took my vitamins, and enjoyed my pregnancy. I think it would have drove me crazy to be obsessively watching every little thing that went into my body and constantly 'resting'. The stress of doing that would have been no good for the baby either :S

I am nearly certain that all these holier than thou types are either men who dont understand, people who have never been pregnant, or people who are kidding themselves. I honestly think you would be hard pushed to find someone who had stuck to the 'rules' right through their pregnancy. Even little things like eating an egg or a nut can cause problems. The last few months are the safest too. So if you are goig to 'cheat', its the best time to do it.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

I swear to god if you listen to all of the guidelines and such when pregnant, you would live on nothing but raw veg. But no carrots as they are bad for you now apparently

I tried to do everything right to begin with. In the end, I ate as I normally do, cut back on drinking and smoking, took my vitamins, and enjoyed my pregnancy. I think it would have drove me crazy to be obsessively watching every little thing that went into my body and constantly 'resting'. The stress of doing that would have been no good for the baby either :S

When my mom was pregnant with my older brother, Liver was supposed to be good for you when you're pregnant so she ate it everyday........now they say it's really bad to eat while pregnant. They're constantly changing the rules on these things.

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

When my mom was pregnant with my older brother, Liver was supposed to be good for you when you're pregnant so she ate it everyday........now they say it's really bad to eat while pregnant. They're constantly changing the rules on these things.

Exactly. Which is why you get conflicting medical advice.

To be honest, I am of the opinion that they dont actually know what causes problems and what doesnt, so they just make it up as they go along. Though obviously blaming smoking/drinking for the bulk, like with everything else (I once went to the docs with a cold and was told it was through smoking )

Apparently when my mum was pregnant, the advice was a pint of Guinness a day to stop anemia. Which is probably where the guinness thing came from from my midwife. I guess I should have listened and forced myself to drink guiness, as through not doing so, I ended up with anemia about 20 weeks in

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

I swear to god if you listen to all of the guidelines and such when pregnant, you would live on nothing but raw veg. But no carrots as they are bad for you now apparently

I tried to do everything right to begin with. In the end, I ate as I normally do, cut back on drinking and smoking, took my vitamins, and enjoyed my pregnancy. I think it would have drove me crazy to be obsessively watching every little thing that went into my body and constantly 'resting'. The stress of doing that would have been no good for the baby either :S

I am nearly certain that all these holier than thou types are either men who dont understand, people who have never been pregnant, or people who are kidding themselves. I honestly think you would be hard pushed to find someone who had stuck to the 'rules' right through their pregnancy. Even little things like eating an egg or a nut can cause problems. The last few months are the safest too. So if you are goig to 'cheat', its the best time to do it.

Well done you vicky, so either now there will be a full 180 from some or you will be ripped to shreds.... Place your bets!

[Kizzy]

Wow that's a lot of choices....
She was humiliated by a person who knew little or nothing about the 'effects' which appear to be at best negligible.
Many doctors and midwives advocated guinness and mackesons stout during pregnancy, and the British Heart Foundation suggest 1 125ml red wine beneficial...
There is conflicting advice but the real issue is again down to our British attitude to alcohol, that it is something to have when you want to get ****faced and thats it.....
If you travelled to France Italy or Germany what would their attitude be?

[Vicky.]

Also, I feel the need to point out here..when I was actually IN LABOUR..the hospital pumped me full of codeine, told me to go home and have a bath and a glass of wine (while on tablets!) and relax.

So no, I dont think it can do as much harm as some think. Or the hospital wouldn't have advised that. I don't drink wine anyway unless I want to get pissed, so I didnt do it mind.

Some of you would think I was an absolute monster when I was pregnant, I never gave up smoking completely, though I did cut down to about 2 a day..midwife said this was ok as smoking so little is pretty much the same as not smoking. I drank blue wkd (it was one of my cravings in the early days too..which was awkward ) a few times a week..though only one or two small bottles too.