[Toy Soldier]

Originally Posted by Fetch The Bolt Cutters

I feel like you’ve just completely missed the point here my love

Yeah her son had just died but she didn’t even really know him (not that she was to blame for that though)

Jill was his proper family and his maw had prevented them from being together when he passed away which was done out of nowt but spite so yeah so totally did deserve it

I’d have thrown in a slap for good measure meself

I didn't miss the point but it wasn't well written... it could have worked in a myriad of different ways - e.g. if the conversation had been a month later, it could have worked. If Jill had simply been furious/upset about not getting to be with him when he died, it could have worked. BUT she's literally only just found out that he's gone and she has a pre-prepared, cold and calculated take-down for someone who has just seen their child die? It's a narrative mis-step in the first place.

That aside... as she walks away the mum is all of a sudden apologetic and saying "I'm sorry... I didn't know..." which is so far from the realms of realism for how ANYONE would be reacting in that situation that it jumps the shark completely. Let alone a character who has been portrayed as being blinkered and bigoted up until this point... was Jill's speech so poignant that it would somehow reach a freshly-grieving mother and change her entire worldview? No... it's not realistic human psychology... she would be angry, broken and incredulous and tell Jill to go **** herself. Would that be fair or reasonable? No. SHOULD she be sorry for her attitudes and what they have lead to? Absolutely. But realistically, would she be, right there and then having only just heard it? Nope... no chance. Again to be realistic, she would have completely rejected the idea that it was her fault in that moment, and if you want a scene of her having absorbed it and accepted blame, it would come months later after sitting with it and hours of introspection. Even having her angry as Jill walked off, and then one little extra scene of Jill receiving an "I'm sorry, you were right" letter a while later, would have improved the writing there.

I know it's supposed to be a powerful scene but in terms of characterisation, it's not well written, which is a shame because the rest of the writing is brilliant.