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Old 30-01-2022, 01:04 PM #1
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Default Should my friend be offended when he was asked if he was gay by a stranger?

A friend of mine was approached in the street by an apparent neighbour whom he had never seen or spoken to before.

This person struck up a conversation and asked my friend if he was gay. She said it as if she know it anyway. He is by the way. My friend took some offence to it. Coming from a complete stranger.

I agree, I think my friend's neighbour is nosy and cheeky. And rude. What's it any business of hers if my friend is gay.

But to make matters worse, my friend went on a gay support forum and 90% of the replies to his post were saying if the neighbour thought he was gay, then the whole street would know. I agree with my friend. Why should the whole street know he is gay. They have their own lives to live surely. Such a bizarre set of circumstances.
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:10 PM #2
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Very nosy and inappropriate question to ask
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:11 PM #3
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Quote:
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Very nosy and inappropriate question to ask
Yes. Thanks for your support and reply.
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:18 PM #4
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He should have said "I am as it goes and good news - we are recruiting so would you like my card?"
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:20 PM #5
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i would have responded ... are you an android?
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:21 PM #6
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He should have said "I am as it goes and good news - we are recruiting so would you like my card?"
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:22 PM #7
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i would have responded ... are you an android?
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:35 PM #8
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Well the question should of been met with a question, why do you want to know?
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Old 30-01-2022, 01:40 PM #9
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"Offended" no because it's not an insult. "What's your sexuality?" is an odd question to ask someone in casual conversation when you've just met, in my opinion.

It's also yes offensive for people to suggest that it's "obvious" when someone is x/y/z because, inevitably, there's going to be a lot of stereotyping going on there.
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Old 30-01-2022, 02:44 PM #10
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He should have spat on this bitch and shown her he was a feisty gay
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Old 30-01-2022, 02:55 PM #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cherie View Post
Very nosy and inappropriate question to ask
For some reason , there's people who just have zero filter.

And I agree , it's non of her business.
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Old 30-01-2022, 03:08 PM #12
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It was an inappropriate question but he shouldn't be offended...annoyed but not offended. He should just have told her it was none of her business.
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Old 30-01-2022, 03:52 PM #13
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Agree with others, inappropriate however, nothing to be offended by.

Also agree there will be a whole bunch of stereotyping going on in order for it to be 'obvious'. Guessing this means he is camp. However, some straight guys are camp and a hell of a lot of gay guys I know are not by any stretch of the imagination.
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Old 30-01-2022, 06:23 PM #14
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I’m sorry is your profile picture Jeremy vine and Rod Stewart .-.
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Old 30-01-2022, 06:24 PM #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gusto Brunt View Post
A friend of mine was approached in the street by an apparent neighbour whom he had never seen or spoken to before.

This person struck up a conversation and asked my friend if he was gay. She said it as if she know it anyway. He is by the way. My friend took some offence to it. Coming from a complete stranger.

I agree, I think my friend's neighbour is nosy and cheeky. And rude. What's it any business of hers if my friend is gay.

But to make matters worse, my friend went on a gay support forum and 90% of the replies to his post were saying if the neighbour thought he was gay, then the whole street would know. I agree with my friend. Why should the whole street know he is gay. They have their own lives to live surely. Such a bizarre set of circumstances.
‘Your friend’ = you
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Old 30-01-2022, 06:53 PM #16
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It seems a perfectly civil question, maybe a bit nosey but not offensive, unless you think there's something wrong with being a homosexual?

The question I'd ask is why did your friend take offence to it? Is he not proud of his sexuality?

If some stranger came upto me and asked if I was straight or gay, I'd find it a bit of an odd question to be asked by a stranger, but I wouldn't be offended. I'd either tell them to mind their own business or just ask them why they wanted to know that information.
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Old 31-01-2022, 01:19 AM #17
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Not offensive nor is it a civil question. She sounds like a weirdo
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Old 31-01-2022, 02:12 AM #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Glenn. View Post
Not offensive nor is it a civil question. She sounds like a weirdo
The funny thing is Glenn , i bet she'd be offended if someone asked if she was "gay" .
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Old 31-01-2022, 02:34 AM #19
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I’m sorry is your profile picture Jeremy vine and Rod Stewart .-.

You so Wrong.


Its Vine and The Rich Plumber Cockney
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Old 31-01-2022, 08:10 AM #20
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Quote:
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However, some straight guys are camp and a hell of a lot of gay guys I know are not by any stretch of the imagination.
Indeed... I have two good friends from school, one of whom is gay, who I still meet up with regularly. If I was out with them and his boyfriend, and you asked someone to guess who the gay couple was based purely on "campness", they'd definitely vote for my friend who is gay and ... my other friend who is not gay, and has a wife + 2 kids . Because he's camp as Christmas at times and my mate's boyfriend isn't at all (until you get him talking about musical theatre).

That said, my "straight" friend did say he was bi once when we were about 17 (and drunk) then almost immediately took it back the next day, and has ever since claimed he was just trying to make himself seem more interesting.

He probably is bi .
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Old 31-01-2022, 08:20 AM #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Toy Soldier View Post
Indeed... I have two good friends from school, one of whom is gay, who I still meet up with regularly. If I was out with them and his boyfriend, and you asked someone to guess who the gay couple was based purely on "campness", they'd definitely vote for my friend who is gay and ... my other friend who is not gay, and has a wife + 2 kids . Because he's camp as Christmas at times and my mate's boyfriend isn't at all (until you get him talking about musical theatre).

That said, my "straight" friend did say he was bi once when we were about 17 (and drunk) then almost immediately took it back the next day, and has ever since claimed he was just trying to make himself seem more interesting.

He probably is bi .
There is another level which is closet gay, those that have a wife and kids but are secretly meeting men for sex .

For me sexuality makes no difference, for me it’s about being a decent person
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