[Tom]

Best housemate in CBB history

Thanks to Chisato Geeste on DS for these

"This show has 50m viewers right ? They'll all be fascinated to hear about their left brains and right brains"

"Who's Big Brother ?"

" Is Big Brother a computer ?"

"These tasks, couldn't we just bake cakes ? I thought they'd have us out visiting hospitals"

Jackie: "Im glad they stopped that taking 2 people with you to the toilet."
Brigette: "It was just for the medievil task ."
Jackie: "Oh, i thought that was all the time."

"I've had some cooking lessons, this is how you crack a boiled egg"

" I've been learning to cook on TV and have learnt how to make sandwiches .... they were good"

Jackie: "What was he doing taking a shower? Is he crazy?"
Brigitte:"Because it's morning"
Jackie "It's not morning is it?"

"Is England still on the map or have they moved it?"

"I entered a beauty competition once. Ha. I came second"

Jeremy: Do you understand the concept of this show?
Jackie: No

"When do I get to order my food in then?"

"They wanted entertainment so I let them see my ass in the toilet"

"Is John bi-polar or has he had a stroke ?"

"I'm just going to go to bed for 4 days. Check my pulse to see if I'm still alive once in a while"

"You could send a harpist in to play while we're having dinner. You could gag her"

Germaine "Ok everyone, I have a suitcase to pack"
Jackie: "Where are you going?"
Germaine: "I'm leaving"
Jackie: "Why? D'ya get fired?"

"I wonder if they'll replace her with a clown?"

Jackie: "What's this?"
Bez: It's my bed, I'm letting you have it to sleep in"
Jackie: "Is that for punishment? why is it up there?"
Bez: "It's a bunk bed"

Jackie "My only regret is how many times, I've been married".
Brigette " How many?
Jackie "Only 4"

"So when do we go on air?"

"I hate plastic people!"

"I would like to nominate big brother for not having enough imagination and I would like to nominate myself as I haven't contributed enough. I haven't even been to the toilet"

Jackie - I'm not nominated
Lisa - You are nominated
Jackie - Nominated for what?
Lisa - For eviction, you and John

"Big Brother can kiss my ass"

Jackie: "...the little kid, what's your name?"
Kenzie: " 'The Little Kid' apparently"

BB "Can a house mate please come to the diary room"
Jackie "Why would anyone want to go to the diary room, are they mad?"

Jackie: "I'm going to make some toast." (walks over to the diary room)..."Brigette make me some toast"

Jackie: "Any one who watches this show night after night after night needs to do something with thier life"

Jackie: "They need to give me an incentive to stay like a TV in my room & champagne"

Dermot: Have you ever met Vanessa Feltz before?
Jackie: Yes, just now in front of the doughnuts

John leaves the dinner table in a huff
Bez "Are you not eating your dinner John ?"
Jackie : "Leave him alone. He will be ok. He didnt get like he is today by not eating"

"John what's your speciality besides being a pain in the ass ?" If this is your act, fine, if not I suggest you use your money for psychiatric help"

"Who's Davina?"

"John you could give someone a nervous breakdown just sitting there"

Lisa: You should have researched the show before you came on.
Jackie: "Research? For this sh*t show?"

BB: Jackie, you have been evicted
Jackie: Yeah, so what?

John: If Jackie hadn't of come I would of gone first"
Jackie:"Hey son if I knew you were here, I'd never of even bothered coming to start with."

Jackie: Is it normal to be hating everyone else in here?
John: Yes.
Jackie: Oh good. I'm normal.

Kenzie: "Jackie would you like a cup of tea?"
Jackie: "Yeah that would be great, do you know how to make toast to go with it?"