[MissKittyFantastico]

From the Ch4 site:

"Who'd have thought a fresh delivery of magazines in preparation for today's Task would have caused such a stir? But then, it's a big pile of gossip glossies and the housemates are all over them, inside and out.

As the housemates poured over the pages, Lisa started reading juicy snippets about each of them. "Halfwit is out and we think just in time," she read, talking about last Friday's Eviction from a copy of New! "After the arrival of bonkers Bea..."

"Bonkers!" screamed Bea, taking so much umbrage there'll be none left for anyone else. "Bonkers Bea!"

"I want to read the proper pages. What about Jordan?!" continued Lisa. But Bea had stomped off in a huff. Realising everyone she'd normally moan to was crowded round Lisa listening to the latest celeb snippets, Bea stormed out to the Garden to complain to Marcus, who was holed up under a duvet by the pebbles.

"Bonkers! They called me bonkers Bea!" she complained.

"Bwaahahahahhahahahahahahaaaa!" laughed Marcus pointing at her. "You got off lightly!"

"Shut your mouth," she fumed. Clearly this wasn't the response she wanted.

Realising no-one was bothered, or even listening, Bea rejoined the group.

"Is Sophie pregnant?!" read Lisa, as the latest gossip-column-related drama unfolded.

While Sophie read her column-inches, Bea flicked through another magazine.

"Lookalikes!" she yelped after about five minutes, finding another snippet about herself. "Me and blonde lady from Abba! I'm thrilled."

That right, Chiquitita?"





Oh dear, Beatch is 'genuinely very very upset and offended' again!