[Romantic Old Bird]

OK, information for those of you not resourceful (or sad) enough to have taped or watched today's Lorraine.

Helen was in the studio first off, pulling the comedy face, handcuffed to a 'fit' (I suppose, but not a patch on the IPS) looking bloke in motorcycle leathers.
Lorraine posed the question, 'Why has Helen been nicked? I suppose anyone would be glad to be arrested by this guy!'
Cue more face pulling and vigorous head shaking by Helen.

When we return to the item, we see said 'Food Cop' don his helmet, straddle the mean machine, and cross the river, bound dear reader, for our old stomping ground, Hadley Wood.

I recognised it instantly, and just the memory was enough...........................

Sorry, I came over all unecessary for a moment.

He arrives at the door, knocks, and Helen opens it in her leopard print dressing gown, no make up, gob akimbo, eyes half shut. I have to say it was not her best look.

He demands entry to see the contents of her fridge. After making a show of ringing her agent for an alibi, they go over to the large, 50's US style 'Smeg' fridge. There is at this stage nothing on the freezer door.

Contents of the fridge are revealed. it is chokka block with, it has to be said, pretty healthy looking stuff. He espies lip gloss in the fridge door and comments only to be told sternly by Helen, with a pointy finger right in his face that 'LIP GLOSS MUST BE WORN AT ALL TIMES!!'

Pan to Helen sitting at kitchen table (red tablecloth, walls a nice yellow) near the fridge.

We can now see that there is a picture of a bloke on the freezer door, and several more on the side of the fridge. I don't think they were of the IPS, but maybe someone with better eyesight could tell me otherwise.

After Helen had said all the 'unhealthy ' stuff wasn't hers, and that her mum had been down for the weekend and done some cooking (poor old Paul, can you imagine?) they returned to the studio to discuss the contents of her fridge in detail and how she could reduce the fat content.

It was at this stage Helen blamed all inter-fridge transgressions on Paul, and incidentally, as I watched it, OH walked in and said, sensitively, 'God her cheeks look puffy today, is she up the duff?'

I think that just about sums it up. I know the girl is willing to put herself through it for her art, but I have to say, funny as it was, she did not look her best in the dressing gown scene. Let's hope the man is still seeing only lurve on the menu!

It's nice to see her having a bit more fun on the show, and a mention of Mr C is always a bonus!