[Feefs]

I have no doubts that I would NEVER apply for BB3. Not only am I nice enough to know the nation should not be subjected to boring old me (I've not even lived my life like a local working men's club wannabe singer), but I couldn't cope with people seeing me in the shower.
Plus

*My arse is bigger than Liz's
*I say more stupid things than Paul, and my stories are much longer, and I don't even have as many mates as him.
*I have a habit of inventing words myself, and saying things inconsisten with any known logic systems, but they are not as interesting as Helenism. You'd end up with a very short and substandard list of 'Fionaisms'.
*I sleeptalk too
*I don't fart as much as Amma, but the stressful circumstances could have nasty effects on my digestive tract.
*I don't have a life changing moment

Need I go on?

Suffice to say, my mum still hasn't heard me swear. I'm 28 and if I've managed this long, then I'm not going to blow it on national TV. I also can't risk my dad finding out I understand dirty jokes either.