Originally Posted by Zee

Me too, it's so vacuous and you question how much you really mean to these sorts of people. To them, you're just a face in a photograph in an album from a time when they were in one place; but now they are in another, and in a week's time, it'll be another place entirely. That's a hard lesson to learn, as they're often really interesting people who are usually really nice too, but they're just not interested in sticking around.

Do people actually network for friendships though. I mean, I've seen people pretend to be friends with people and then turn on them at the first chance they get, but I've never really seen it in proper friendships.

Maybe I'm just lucky? But friendships requires effort from both parties, and the people that are networking, don't seem to want to share that commitment. Don't get me wrong, my work involves constant networking, but I'd never consider those people friends.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Jesus.

Do people actually network for friendships though. I mean, I've seen people pretend to be friends with people and then turn on them at the first chance they get, but I've never really seen it in proper friendships.

Maybe I'm just lucky? But friendships requires effort from both parties, and the people that are networking, don't seem to want to share that commitment. Don't get me wrong, my work involves constant networking, but I'd never consider those people friends.

Yeah definitely. I study a language at uni so I'm friends (or 'friends') with a lot of people who are constantly moving around either to study, to work or to go on holiday and they just seem to have this endless list of friends that they're always making plans to go and visit in some foreign destination but then something else comes up and you're never really sure if they're talking to you because they consider you a friend or because you're there at that moment in time.

Not all of my friends are like that, but I think perhaps I've come into contact with more people like that than most will in their lives because of what I've chosen to study. These are the kind of people who you will get to know through shared experiences but who will disappear at the drop of a hat and not say a word to you until they're back again. You're never sure where you stand with them.

[arista]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

I don't trust people who try to be friends with everybody, they're the ones to watch those who just network and there's no real connection.

True
a connection is the foundation

[Beastie]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

I don't trust people who try to be friends with everybody, they're the ones to watch those who just network and there's no real connection.

I suppose them people just have a lot of aquaintances or find it hard to let their guard down and have a deep connection with someone because they don't want to get hurt. For the deeper stuff I just talk to one friend about it and not a whole group. I bet it's exhausting to be popular with loads of people. I rather be close to just a handful of people. I don't like it when people say myself or other are ignorant because some people don't always bum others or just need time to themselves.

I think I prefer the friends I have who actually work and keep themselves busy. I have a few unemployed friends who seem to be a bit needy and may think I am a bit ignorant because I don't see them as much because I work 40 hours. Just a bit of paranoia on my part.

[LemonJam]

It depends, with my friends in my birthplace I organize everything and I'm basically the glue that holds the group together. But in London I'm more of a 1 on 1 friendships kind of person rather than in a group. I guess I'm a mix.

[Kate!]

Originally Posted by LemonJam

It depends, with my friends in my birthplace I organize everything and I'm basically the glue that holds the group together. But in London I'm more of a 1 on 1 friendships kind of person rather than in a group. I guess I'm a mix.

Quite true of me as well, I'm ok in a group and do usually end up being the designated organiser, it's a natural talent

I'd be a good party planner or charity events organiser if I ever chose to go down that route.

I prefer one on one friendships overall.

[Kazanne]

I like to think I am a loyal friend but not to the point of being blinded to their 'bad' sides,I have a couple of really good friends and lots of aquaintainces , I find it hard to trust people myself and it takes me a while to make friends but when I do its usually pretty tight,internet friends are a different thing altogether,I've come to like some I didn't and vice versa,but I've bonded with a handful and have fun with them,In my friendships I am a bit of a leader(does that mean bossy?)It's sometimes me who decides where we go etc,but only because my bessie is so indecisive ,she is happy for me to do that,but more often than not we just debate and go with that.

[Beastie]

I just join in. I don't organise anything unless it's just me and one friend. But if I am in a group of friends then I will let the stronger person of the group organise. I will help the organised friend if they need help organising something though. It's not fair in a friendship group when 1 or 2 people sit back, do nothing and add little contribution.

[GypsyGoth]

I get the feeling I'd be interrupting my friend or sister if I texted them suggesting we do something. So I usually wait till they initiate such a convo. I don't have the highest of self esteems.

And I suppose I'm more of a follower, but I'm also very content with just my own company.

[Roy Mars III]

I would say I am more of a laid back friend. I am definitely not the type of person who would take the time to organize something. I am also really boring and never really want to do anything so I have to be almost dragged along to things since I rather stay at home. The only thing that will get me out of the house is Dungeons and Dragons and the promise of chicken wings

[Jords]

When in a group at first I do a lot of listening, little talking, and observe the conversations that come about. I make first impressions who I like (and who I dont like so much) and sort of go on from there. I usually end up one of the most talkative by the end of the night.

I tend to organise a fair amount of meet-ups and night-outs also.

But I do love to observe at first, and pick-up like when somebody makes a comment that doesnt sit well with somebody but it goes unnoticed but Ive picked up on the body language

[Marc]

I'm a bit of a horrible friend at times.

I can get bored of my friends really easily and if I'm with them too long I usually develop feelings of where I just need to be alone. But I can be really nice sometimes

[Z]

Originally Posted by Marc

I'm a bit of a horrible friend at times.

I can get bored of my friends really easily and if I'm with them too long I usually develop feelings of where I just need to be alone. But I can be really nice sometimes

Oh I get that too; I'm quite bipolar when it comes to friends really. I get bored and pine for human contact if I haven't seen anyone in over a day; but if I hang out with people all day then I want nothing more than to be alone for a day. My weekends are usually Friday - get home from work and do nothing. Saturday - hang out with people all day. Sunday - spend it alone.

[Marc]

We should sync our weekly schedule.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Marc

We should sync our weekly schedule.

No because we'd both cancel on each other

[Marc]

Originally Posted by Zee

No because we'd both cancel on each other

The sad realisation that you're going to die alone.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Marc

The sad realisation that you're going to die alone.

I realised that years ago. I'm going to be one of those people who dies in his flat and nobody will realise for years.

[Marc]

Originally Posted by Zee

I realised that years ago. I'm going to be one of those people who dies in his flat and nobody will realise for years.

The local cats will find you

[Joelle.]

Always the third wheel, since I'm quite shy and quiet.

For example if my friends are walking in a line next to each other, I always end up walking behind.

[BigSister]

I don't really have many friends but the ones I do have I tend to be the planner.

[Withano]

A secondary friend of mine said I was the alpha male of my primary friends and it made me sad

[Z]

Originally Posted by Withano

A secondary friend of mine said I was the alpha male of my primary friends and it made me sad

Why did that make you sad?!

[Marc]

You'll always be the Alpha male in my heart, and my lungs

[Z]

You're #1 in my heart and #2 in my toilet, Marc

[Marc]

I'm sure you've said that somewhere else on this forum mister