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30-05-2009, 11:28 AM
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Senior Member
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Today, I leaned back in my chair. I leaned back to far, so I panicked and grabbed the table in front of me. I'm ok
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30-05-2009, 11:32 AM
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Senior Member
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Today, I forgot my calculator and I had a final exam. It's okay though, it was an english exam.
Today, I woke up in Vegas. I wasn't too excited, I've lived here my whole life. Today, my friend asked me if I liked her shirt. I said yes. I didn't really like it. This morning when I woke up, I couldn't see. So, I turned on the lights. Today, my boyfriend called me saying he couldnt go out because he was sick. When I drove over to his house to surprise him with a "get well soon" card, he was not making out with my sister. He thanked me 
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30-05-2009, 11:32 AM
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van der Woodsen
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"Today, my teacher saw me texting under the desk and grabbed my phone. She didnt grab my penis. MLIA."
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30-05-2009, 11:34 AM
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Senior Member
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Today, a Tic-tac got stuck sideways in its container. I tapped it with my hand and dislodged it
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30-05-2009, 11:38 AM
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****
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Today, prior to riding an intense rollercoaster, a young girl warned me not to put my arms up, since they would get ripped off. I put my arms up. They're still attached far as I know. MLIA.
PMSL |
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30-05-2009, 11:38 AM
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#8 | |||
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Senior Member
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Today, I felt a lump on my chest. But it's okay, it was my breast. MLIA.
Today, I went to a restaurant, but they didn't have a vegetarian selection. That's OK considering I love meat. MLIA Today, my parents walked into my room as I was taking drugs. They were proud of me. I usually forget to take my allergy medicine. MLIA Today I had sex with my secretary. She is my wife. MLIA. |
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30-05-2009, 11:43 AM
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Senior Member
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Today, I ate Mentos and drank cola at the same time. I'm fine. MLIA.
Today, I found out my blood type is B. My parents are type A and O. It's not genetically possible to be blood type B if your parents are A and O. But it was ok since I knew I'm adopted. MLIA Today, I was eating chips and seven layer dip. Just to make sure, I counted the layers. There were seven. MLIA. |
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30-05-2009, 02:16 PM
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****
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Today, my dad had a knife and was crying in the kitchen. Now, we have freshly cut onions. MLIA
Today, I had sex with my best friend. But it's okay cuz we've been married for 3 years. MLIA Today, I pushed my grandma around. It's okay, she's in a wheelchair. MLIA pmsl |
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