[InOne]

Yeah it definitely happens no doubt. I don't think it's a class or benefit thing though, just the women themselves. Some women just happen to find someone who'll support them throughout life.

[Vicky.]

It happens, its not as widespread as some would have you believe though. And tbh to me, its crazyness. Having kids (and I only have 2 and its staying that way, god knows what its like with more) is so much more work that work is I had much more energy and free time doing even 60 hours per week than now

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by Jamesy

I actually know someone (my cousin, in her 40s) that is quite explicit about how they have never wanted to work and that they have had kids just to stay out of work. Most of my family hate her but I find it quite interesting the lengths she (and probably many other 'scroungers') go to just to live a stress-free life and better lifestyle.

Recently the local jobcentre was catching on to her to get into work so she started looking roughed up and persuaded them that she was depressed and struggling, cue being 'ill' for a few weeks. After that she went through some process to say that she was suffering because she had to take care of her disabled daughter 24/7 (her daughter has a speech impairment and is perfectly dependable, she's now 13 and in high school and doesn't need any help). She needed a signature from someone in a professional medical role to confirm she does need to be on hand 24/7 to take care of her daughter, tried to get a signature from my mum (who works in the NHS), my mum refused but my cousin found someone else to write a signature and ta da, she now doesn't have to go to the jobcentre and gets more benefits for 3 or 4 years until there's a reassessment. She has gloated about this loads, how she 'tricked' the jobcentre and how she's so relieved she doesn't have to work and can relax for 3 or 4 years.

My cousin baffles the rest of us (in my family). Her mum and dad worked all their lives, her brother is now in his late 30s and owns a massive cake business with his wife that works with UK brands like Krispy Kreme and Sainsburys. Yet my cousin hasn't lifted a finger her entire life. Pregnant at 16, now has 3 kids, a very big house on a pretty nice estate (usually council areas are rough but she lives in quite a nice area), and all the money she could dream of.

It's quite infuriating when I look at my parents, who have worked their entire lives and gone through a hell of a lot to provide me and my brother with a decent lifestyle, and then I look at my cousin who lives in a similar (if not better) lifestyle and all she did for that was sleep with two different guys and have three kids over 20 years.

The UK system really needs a massive shake-up. When I went to Catalonia (Spain) and spoke to some locals there they told me of the system there which sounds pretty good. If you have a child you get financial support for a certain amount of time (I think it was something like 2 years), then after that the support stops and you're expected to have a job. If you have more children you get support for a less amount of time, so if with the first kid you get 2 years support, the second child you get 1 year, the third child 6 months etc. The locals I spoke to said it works very well there, more people work, less people have children for the sake of it and generally it's managed very well. It's a shame the UK doesn't have harsher systems in place similar to that.

A well written and very informative post Jamesy and yet more direct experience testimony that this practice does exist.

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

It happens, its not as widespread as some would have you believe though. And tbh to me, its crazyness. Having kids (and I only have 2 and its staying that way, god knows what its like with more) is so much more work that work is I had much more energy and free time doing even 60 hours per week than now

It's harder work raising kids if you are raising them correctly - or at all - Vicky, but that's not guaranteed with all parents judging by the amount of feral kids around.

[JoshBB]

If we had the people at the top paying their taxes properly, false benefit claiming wouldn't matter so much.. and I can't remember whose policy it was, but I liked the one where after the second child benefits would stop (but that cap shouldn't apply for anyone who has more than 2 children currently and is on benefits imo)

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by JoshBB

If we had the people at the top paying their taxes properly, false benefit claiming wouldn't matter so much.. and I can't remember whose policy it was, but I liked the one where after the second child benefits would stop (but that cap shouldn't apply for anyone who has more than 2 children currently and is on benefits imo)

I agree that proper investigation of tax avoiders and evaders should be implemented by government Josh, and that all the deliberately created loopholes which facilitate such scandalous practices should be closed, but this issue and the one of benefit fraudsters are totally separate, and it should always matter that a system designed to alleviate the plight of the less fortunate in society is being exploited by those who do not qualify to the cost of those that do, as well as to the taxpayer.

I agree that Child Benefits should be capped overall but also think that they should be scrapped altogether for the 'Top Earners' in our society.

[AnnieK]

I think someone else has addressed this but one thing that also needs looking at is childcare costs. I was very lucky that I had my parents around when I returned to work when my son was 6 months old, otherwise I would have really struggled to manage my money if I was forking out £46 per day (what my son's nursery charges and that's fairly cheap) to a nursery. I now get 15 hours per week free child care in term time so he now goes part time to nursery but I still have to rely on help from my dad to care for him when he's not in. If I didn't have that support it would not have been financially viable for me to come back to work and I'm in a fairly well paid job.

I think one of the parties have promised 15 hour free care for 2 year olds (its currently 3) but as Mat pay only lasts for 9 months there is still a shortfall when parents without support have to fund all the childcare which in the private nurseries is very expensive.

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by AnnieK

I think someone else has addressed this but one thing that also needs looking at is childcare costs. I was very lucky that I had my parents around when I returned to work when my son was 6 months old, otherwise I would have really struggled to manage my money if I was forking out £46 per day (what my son's nursery charges and that's fairly cheap) to a nursery. I now get 15 hours per week free child care in term time so he now goes part time to nursery but I still have to rely on help from my dad to care for him when he's not in. If I didn't have that support it would not have been financially viable for me to come back to work and I'm in a fairly well paid job.

I think one of the parties have promised 15 hour free care for 2 year olds (its currently 3) but as Mat pay only lasts for 9 months there is still a shortfall when parents without support have to fund all the childcare which in the private nurseries is very expensive.

Yes my sister is having problems with childcare at the minute. She split from her partner and has a child but works (or worked..) fulltime and wanted to conitnue doing so. She got *some* help with childcare costs but not enough to continue doing fulltime. Because of this, she has had no option but to go part time instead, and she is better off for it too :S The jobcentre actually said to her 'do you not speak to your parents' As if grandparents should be on tap babysitters....my parents still both work but even if they didnt its un fair to expect them to watch the grandkids 24/7

On the subject of people having kids for benefits, heres a story thats ****ing disgusting but true, think I have mentioned it before on here actually. When I had just left school, a girl I know purposely got pregnant for a council house. She got the house, then had an abortion a week later. Now THAT is sick. And the system shouldn't allow it to happen, nor make people feel they HAVE to be pregnant to get help either...

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by AnnieK

I think someone else has addressed this but one thing that also needs looking at is childcare costs. I was very lucky that I had my parents around when I returned to work when my son was 6 months old, otherwise I would have really struggled to manage my money if I was forking out £46 per day (what my son's nursery charges and that's fairly cheap) to a nursery. I now get 15 hours per week free child care in term time so he now goes part time to nursery but I still have to rely on help from my dad to care for him when he's not in. If I didn't have that support it would not have been financially viable for me to come back to work and I'm in a fairly well paid job.

I think one of the parties have promised 15 hour free care for 2 year olds (its currently 3) but as Mat pay only lasts for 9 months there is still a shortfall when parents without support have to fund all the childcare which in the private nurseries is very expensive.

Totally valid points Annie, and something which the government should also be addressing urgently.

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

Yes my sister is having problems with childcare at the minute. She split from her partner and has a child but works (or worked..) fulltime and wanted to conitnue doing so. She got *some* help with childcare costs but not enough to continue doing fulltime. Because of this, she has had no option but to go part time instead, and she is better off for it too :S The jobcentre actually said to her 'do you not speak to your parents' As if grandparents should be on tap babysitters....my parents still both work but even if they didnt its un fair to expect them to watch the grandkids 24/7

On the subject of people having kids for benefits, heres a story thats ****ing disgusting but true, think I have mentioned it before on here actually. When I had just left school, a girl I know purposely got pregnant for a council house. She got the house, then had an abortion a week later. Now THAT is sick. And the system shouldn't allow it to happen, nor make people feel they HAVE to be pregnant to get help either...

I agree Vicky with the first part of your post, and also feel disgusted by the mercenary, selfish, lazy cruel bitch in the second part.

[Northern Monkey]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

Yes my sister is having problems with childcare at the minute. She split from her partner and has a child but works (or worked..) fulltime and wanted to conitnue doing so. She got *some* help with childcare costs but not enough to continue doing fulltime. Because of this, she has had no option but to go part time instead, and she is better off for it too :S The jobcentre actually said to her 'do you not speak to your parents' As if grandparents should be on tap babysitters....my parents still both work but even if they didnt its un fair to expect them to watch the grandkids 24/7

On the subject of people having kids for benefits, heres a story thats ****ing disgusting but true, think I have mentioned it before on here actually. When I had just left school, a girl I know purposely got pregnant for a council house. She got the house, then had an abortion a week later. Now THAT is sick. And the system shouldn't allow it to happen, nor make people feel they HAVE to be pregnant to get help either...

That's disgusting.I don't know how anyone could do that and not have it on their conscience for years to come.

[Kizzy]

That's grim, I remember in the early 90s in east Leeds young people getting pregnant for council properties as it was the only way to get housed.

[Vicky.]

Yeah I don't think it works like that anymore thankfully. Though I do expect if you have kids/are pregnant you get more priority.