[Kate!]

I'm questioning my own sexuality lately. Well have felt this way for a while actually. I suppose I could easily have ticked asexual in the poll as opposed to heterosexual.

I mean I do have a sex life but I'd be as happy with a cup of tea and a biscuit really. And lots of cuddles. I like affection and am quite a touchy feely person..I like to demonstrate it.

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Kate!

I'm questioning my own sexuality lately. Well have felt this way for a while actually. I suppose I could easily have ticked asexual in the poll as opposed to heterosexual.

I mean I do have a sex life but I'd be as happy with a cup of tea and a biscuit really. And lots of cuddles. I like affection and am quite a touchy feely person..I like to demonstrate it.

I think that’s called getting on a bit Kate sex drive lessens for most as we get older ..look at LT hanging up his boots

[Kate!]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I think that’s called getting on a bit Kate sex drive lessens for most as we get older ..look at LT hanging up his boots

I think you are right Cherie xx

[Crimson Dynamo]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I think that’s called getting on a bit Kate sex drive lessens for most as we get older ..look at LT hanging up his boots

im not paying for online dating in a flipping pandemic lockdown

it should be free at the moment

[Epic.]

Seeing as there is no multi-choice option, I went with Other; I'd consider myself a mix of the two options on top. I am heterosexual in more or less every way but may sometimes have thoughts about the same gender, however I never truly feel that way about a man in the same way I would a woman.

I went into this thread hoping bicurious to be one of the options based on what I am describing but alas .

[Liam-]

Does every thread these days turn into a transgender row? Have a day off

[Liam-]

Also, fully fledged homosexual x

[Ramsay]

What happened to the love buzz hugs

[Liam-]

I’m also on board with the cuddle thing, those ‘we went all night’ people are weird, one and done with an even 6 hours kip will do me tah

[Alf]

Originally Posted by Liam-

I’m also on board with the cuddle thing, those ‘we went all night’ people are weird, one and done with an even 6 hours kip will do me tah

Youtube video

[Gstar]

Gay

[Jessica.]

Demisexual, engaged to a man.

[Redway]

Originally Posted by Jessica.

Demisexual, engaged to a man.

I’m not here to echo those transphobic sentiments but what makes demisexuality distinct?

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by Redway

I’m not here to echo those transphobic sentiments but what makes demisexuality distinct?

She only feels sexual attraction to someone she loves I think.

[Redway]

Like I said I’m not the one to dismiss orientation labels but I’m struggling to see how demisexuality is a sexual orientation in and of itself. I would’ve thought it’s more akin to to a specifier that can be applied to any of the three main sexualities since straight, gay and bisexual people alike might only form sexual attachments with people they feel an emotional bond with.

[Oliver_W]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

She only feels sexual attraction to someone she loves I think.

That doesn't warrant its own label. Only sleeping with someone one loves is called "not being a slut".

[Redway]

I’ve got to side with Ollie as far as that one’s concerned. Pansexuality’s up for debate (on the implication that a pansexual would be attracted to those intermediate/transgender identifications whereas a “purely” bisexual person wouldn’t) but demisexual’s really stretching it. I don’t think it warrants an orientation label in and of itself.

[Smithy]

Originally Posted by Oliver_W

That doesn't warrant its own label. Only sleeping with someone one loves is called "not being a slut".

So sleeping with someone you don’t love is being a slut?

[Oliver_W]

Originally Posted by Marsh.

Only feels sexual attraction to someone she has feelings for.

Still doesn't need its own label.

[Jessica.]

Originally Posted by Redway

I’m not here to echo those transphobic sentiments but what makes demisexuality distinct?

I'm literally not attracted to any gender or any defining characteristics, demisexuality is a type of asexuality. I am asexual in every way apart from with this one person, I have never had a crush on anyone, never thought someone was hot, nothing. I'm only able to feel anything at all with my fiancé.

[DouglasS]

Two spirited omnigendered Demisexual with tendencies of pansexuality

[Smithy]

I think (from my perspective anyway) sexuality is the group or gender (or whatever) of people you’re attracted too, if you’re only attracted to someone that you form an emotional connection with then that seems valid?

[Redway]

Originally Posted by Smithy

I think (from my perspective anyway) sexuality is the group or gender (or whatever) of people you’re attracted too, if you’re only attracted to someone that you form an emotional connection with then that seems valid?

Either way it doesn’t have a great deal to do with orientation per se does it.

[user104658]

To be fair, I think people only feeling sexual attraction to people they have gotten to know and like (i.e. sexual feelings linked to emotional intimacy rather than basic physical impulse) is probably much more common than you'd think, and I'm not personally convinced it counts as a sexuality outside of the straight/gay/bi/asexual range.

In fact I think the argument that those are the only four "basic" sexualities that exist is pretty strong. Certainly, you'll get "subsets" within those (e.g. some straight people will struggle to be attracted to trans people, some will see no distinction, indeed some will have a preference) but surely, a man who is sexually attracted to a transwoman is not "pansexual", they are still a straight man, in terms of aesthetics.

And while there may be a gamut of descriptive genders, in terms of APPEARANCE and thus attraction it is still a binary; people who are mostly attracted to masculine features, people who are mostly attracted to feminine features, and people who can be attracted to both (or neither).

The crux of it I suppose its that it's about attractiveness to others and while you get to decide who you are attracted to - you don't get a personal choice about who YOU are attractive TO... e.g. A woman can be sexually attracted to a gay man, him being gay doesn't make him not attractive to straight females.

In that sense, the concepts of gender non-binary personal identification, and the inherently binary nature of sexual attraction, isn't 100% compatible... An attractive person with feminine features who identified as gender non-binary is not only attractive to "pansexuals"... They will still be mainly attractive to "people who are attracted to females", and probably not to those attracted to males. And I don't think it's -phobic in any way to point out that, no matter what someone's personal identification is, from an objective standpoint they are going to have masculine features, feminine features, or a mix of both. There is no 3rd/4th/5th+ feature set.

[Elliot]

Why would anyone want to discuss the way they feel about their sexuality/gender on here when this is what they’ll get