[Jackie]

DRAMA in the jungle on Thursday night after Gino D'Acampo's insect attack drew this warning from Joe Bugner:

"If that tick goes anywhere near his brain he'll go dead from the neck up."


Worrying news indeed.


But, hey, we finally have an explanation for Kerry Katona's behaviour since she left that camp back in 2003.


Elsewhere on I'M A CELEBRITY 2009? Bad times. For I fear once the series is over we'll all be saying it was a bit like the fire Kim Woodburn and George Hamilton tried to light on Day One.


It just didn't get going.


Where's the comedy gold? The tension? The intrigue? The romance? The showers?


ITV will no doubt say the ratings have been good. But with three weekend leg-ups from The X Factor plus their week-long Jordan Factor, how could they not be?


They'll also probably blame Katie Price. And yes, her presence in that camp is the main reason the show has stiffed so badly. But they put her in there!


Truly, you have to marvel at their dogged determination to ruin their best show:


Booking an iffy (almost totty-free) line-up. Interrupting the crucial second week for a meaningless football match. Interrupting the show in general with more ad breaks than X Factor. Meddling with the eviction process like Big Brother fools. And totally murdering what was once an unmissable ITV2 spin-off show.


But the biggest let down of all this year? Ant & Dec have barely started shifting through the gears.

Gems
Sure there were a couple of gems during the week. Dec's Kim-hair cardigan already sits proudly in the all-time Top Ten, while Ant suppressing his fnaars after Dec said "Justin is taking it hard" was a schoolboy joy to watch.


But mainly they seem to be treading water rather than pedalling those little hamster wheels like crazy. Have they become lazy? Too busy throwing Wii challenge parties in their Winnebago? Or are they finding this year's lot just as uninspiring as we are?


Thing is, we look to them to make this show better than the sum of its (spare) parts.


Especially in a bad year.


One thing we certainly don't look to them for is shameless plugs for their books. Cos a plug's a plug, boys. Whether you hide it behind a Chuckle Brothers gag or not. (In any case, there's only one kind of plug Dec need concern himself with right now. Cos his hair has scattered so much they could start using his head as a back-up Bushtucker Clearing.)


Back in camp, I suppose there is a plus side to such a lacklustre affair. I can't pick a nailed-on winner.


My early favourite Gino will surely be exposed as a sneaky game-player any day now.


Kim is just a My Little Show Pony who deserved instant eviction the minute she sighed, "If I could leave now I would." (So just go woman!) George is still a third placer and his "now you see it, now you don't" tash is freaking me out.


Justin's already peaked with his wailing over Colin's exit. And even if Stuart and Sabrina have a cynical fumble in the jungle I'm not sure anyone out here will really care.


As for Jimmy White, despite the producers' best efforts he is still making an evening of looking at Stephen Hendry's holiday slides seem appealing.


Which leaves Joe. An unfancied latecomer who, so far, is soaring above the cynical reasons ITV booked him and is easily my favourite camper.


Surprisingly funny, a total wind-up merchant, fearless in the trials. And, thanks to that Frank Spencer/Du Plessis from Wild At Heart hybrid of his, in possession of the best comedy jungle voice since David Gest.


Plus, out of the lot of them he's probably the only one who doesn't care if he wins or not.


So that's settled, then.


Vote Joe - once he's beaten Stuart tonight.


RANDOM I'm A Celeb thoughts. Jungle Arms? Not only the name of the Bushtucker Trial pub but also, I'm told, the nickname given to hairy-limbed X Factor silverback Simon Cowell by certain people backstage.


Critterish Allsorts? Sounds like the kind of nibble Sam Fox might enjoy in China.


Iceland's "party like a celeb" ad. Forget cheese puffs, where's the cocaine and hookers?


Gino robbing Paul Young's house when he was younger. Did he only realise whose home it was when he saw Paul's hat lying there?

[eye sea]

I don't know how Gino is so popular. He's a big-mouth pain in the ass.

And boring Stuart, I hope he goes tonight. Zzzz....

[Harry!]

Originally Posted by eye sea

I don't know how Gino is so popular. He's a big-mouth pain in the ass.

And boring Stuart, I hope he goes tonight. Zzzz....

No, Gino is funny and Joe has to go tonight!

[eye sea]

Originally Posted by Recylopse

No, Gino is funny and Joe has to go tonight!

You have your view, I have mine.

[Jackie]

Joe to go.

[Harry!]

Originally Posted by eye sea

You have your view, I have mine.

Yes we shall leave it at that lol.

[Jackie]

Well Joe did go tonight..............good.

[King Gizzard]

Joe was a legend. the show has just got worse

[eye sea]

Originally Posted by Nate

Joe was a legend. the show has just got worse

Joe deserved to stay by a long chalk. People only wanted to keep Stuart because he's supposedly 'eye candy'.

A visit to Spec Savers for those voters.